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Climbing Jokes
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Lay 'em on. |
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A boulder bro, a trad dad and a cool sport climber walk into a bar, the bartender is like; 'is this some kind of joke?' |
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curt86irocwrote: Hey, no memes in the text thread! |
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Two stupid climbers on a 5.10a sport route, the tall one comes off at the crux, the short one sends because he was a little more on! |
David Kwrote: Damn, you got me! |
Francois Dumaswrote: Lol how did I know I would see a trad dad one right off the bat. Well played sir. |
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I think James Pearson rating Walk of Life E12 may qualify as a climbing joke, but then again I've never really gotten dry British humor (or climbing grades for that matter) |
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Speed climbing |
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Just endless variations of the "they'll tell you" joke. How do you spot a climber/trad climber/aid climber/pro climber/5.13 climber/guide/route developer at a party? |
Mark Starrwrote: Hey, I resemble that remark! |
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What do you call a professional climber or guide that has recently been dumped? Homeless. |
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Why did the mountaineer walk into a deep hole? Because it is not there. (Taken from an old Gary Larsen cartoon.) |
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What car does Chris Sharma drive? Psaaaat |
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Why did the climber get scared? He was too high! |
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Don’t lose control of the ropes at an intermediate rappel anchor. Hahaha. Ha. |
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An old one. Y'all have probably heard it too many times, but What's the difference between a golfer and a climber? A golfer goes whack... shit! A climber goes shit! whack... |
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What do you do when there’s a pro climber at your door?
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Stolen from another thread, but: What's the difference between a guide and a large pizza? A large pizza can feed a family of four. |
Kristian Solemwrote: Kinda like the difference between creatures with endoskeletons and creatures with exoskeletons. When you crush em one goes squish-crunch and the other goes crunch-squish |
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What do you call a climber without a rope? An ambulance. |
