overheard at the crag: post it

Lena chita wrote:

Overheard at the gym today. Gym desk staff to my partner:

I saw you hang on that black route over there. Did you flash it?

My partner, thoroughly confused: no, I hung.

Gym staff person: but did you flash it to the top?

Ah, so they settled for the onsight 

Steve Climber wrote:

Ah, so they settled for the onsight 

It was a hella splitter onsight, tho.

M Rox wrote:

"You want a divorce because I want a second dog, I want a divorce because you rack gates in." 

"Okay, let's watch that video."

One of a pair of bros who showed up at a local sport crag and proceeded to watch videos on harnessing up and tying in.

Lena chita wrote:

Overheard at the gym today. Gym desk staff to my partner:

I saw you hang on that black route over there. Did you flash it?

My partner, thoroughly confused: no, I hung.

Gym staff person: but did you flash it to the top?

I was checking ticks on a route I put up a few years ago. Someone's ticks said they flashed it on 3 separate occasions. I sent them a pm to explain the term.

Overheard from the local gym and crag:
-My fingers are tenderonies.
-This route is totally chossy.
-If you climb like I climb youd be high like everyday.
-Im on a three carrot a day diet.
-Climbing harnesses are like push up bras for butts.

we can play this game all night! 

Lena chita wrote:

Overheard at the gym today. Gym desk staff to my partner:

I saw you hang on that black route over there. Did you flash it?

My partner, thoroughly confused: no, I hung.

Gym staff person: but did you flash it to the top?

Hung once (flash at my gym)

Kevin Suarte wrote:

Overheard from the local gym and crag:
-My fingers are tenderonies.
-This route is totally chossy.
-If you climb like I climb youd be high like everyday.
-Im on a three carrot a day diet.
-Climbing harnesses are like push up bras for butts.

we can play this game all night!

climbing gym grunt here--never felt so privileged for working a dead shift [5am-11am]. i imagined half of these and immediately lost appx. 2 brain cells

i think the goofiest thing i've ever heard was someone being confused about our use of noxiously heavy kettlebells instead of floor-bolted ground anchors @ 6am & even then, i get it

Nothing too crazy, but it gave me a chuckle…

A while back at a wall with a few beginner sport climbs.

Boyfriend is leading.  The girlfriend belaying has all the accoutrements you could ever want — belay glasses, belay gloves, a plethora of lead certifications, and even a spare belay device (I suppose in case her grigri wore out during the session.)

Boyfriend looks a little uneasy on the climb, but his clipping is solid.  I know because he loudly announced each clip so I had plenty of warning to watch.

After the fourth or so clip (well into safe fall territory) his foot skates off and he (clearly to his surprise) takes a 2ish foot fall.  The girlfriend is incensed!  “You forgot to say falling!  That could’ve been really dangerous!!”

“You forgot to say falling” is now one of my favorite heckles to someone trying hard at their limit.

Sometimes you forget how little non-climbers understand about climbing. I attached a picture of myself leading a sport climb to my annual Holiday letter and got this reply back from one of my friends:

"Is that you half way up a sheer rock face with a rope *below* you? Jeepers."

Gave me a smile.

Erroll M wrote:

climbing gym grunt here--never felt so privileged for working a dead shift [5am-11am]. i imagined half of these and immediately lost appx. 2 brain cells

i think the goofiest thing i've ever heard was someone being confused about our use of noxiously heavy kettlebells instead of floor-bolted ground anchors @ 6am & even then, i get it

What was your response? (Just in case I get asked that same question.....)

Matt Robinson wrote:

Overheard at the gym: "you can tell who the people who are close to professionals are because they have more stuff on their harness"

By more stuff they mean the 2 random quickdraws, quicklink, and PAS which a few not quite intermediate level climbers seem to have permanently attached to their gym harnesses for toproping 25ft 5.9s

That is why I wear a double rack when gym climbing… always remembering to bring some hexes. 

Tim DiGiulio wrote:

That is why I wear a double rack when gym climbing… always remembering to bring some hexes. 

A double rack and hexes are just too heavy, I prefer a bunch of 000 C3s and RPs, it's gets the point across without actually making you stronger through weight training 

At the Red (where else?), a couple bros: “Ya we just did our first 12a yesterday and heard 14a is just pumpy 12a between each bolt.”

Guy waiting to get on his proj: “Ummmm ok ya sure, I’ll watch”

Bro pulls on the wall, instantly starfished, “TaaAAaÄake!”

Then his ill-fated stick-clip top-rope ass-first pendulum through the sandy base under the climb: The tension was juuuust enough to his center of mass off the ground but he was still able to flail every limb through the silt until he came to a rest, a real sight.

“Dirt me!” He commanded, and was lowered 5 inches. Now erect, smacking dust off himself like a chimney sweep caricature “Oh well, maybe someday”

Guy waiting totally deadpan “you sure you’re done? Looks like you got it next try!”

Bro “really, ya think? Ya why not”

A minute later: “TaæãAaake”. Another epic bum dragger sand plume. “Ugh so clooooose, cool if i try again?”

Guy now eating an apple with a grin “honestly, I got aaaall day, you got this man”

Adam bloc wrote:

At the Red (where else?), a couple bros: “Ya we just did our first 12a yesterday and heard 14a is just pumpy 12a between each bolt.”

Guy waiting to get on his proj: “Ummmm ok ya sure, I’ll watch”

Bro pulls on the wall, instantly starfished, “TaaAAaÄake!”

Then proceeds to take his ill-fated stick-clip top-rope ass-first pendulum through the sandy base under the climb. While smacking dust off himself like a chimney sweep caricature “Oh well, maybe someday”

Guy waiting totally deadpan “you sure you’re done? Looks like you got it next try!”

Bro “really, ya think? Ya why not”

A minute later: “TaæãAaake”. Another epic ass dragger sand plume. “Ugh so clooooose, cool if i try again?”

Guy now eating an apple with a grin “honestly, I got aaaall day, you got this man”

That last story is a GREAT partner! I hafta admit, the start is hard, sometimes. But, the "boulder problem in the sky" things are out there, too. Sometimes, too close to the ground. Yeah, we got some pretty stupid bolting, too. 

Matt Robinson wrote:

A double rack and hexes are just too heavy, I prefer a bunch of 000 C3s and RPs, it's gets the point across without actually making you stronger through weight training 

We get it dude, you're rich, no need to rub it in

I climb with this on my harness to let other people know I’m a professional  

It always surprises me to see people with gym tags outside.  Don't people realize you can own two harnesses?

phylp phylp wrote:

I climb with this on my harness to let other people know I’m a professional  

Edited to say, these are on my gym harness.   Kind of my version of a charm bracelet.

It always surprises me to see people with gym tags outside.  Don't people realize you can own two harnesses?

I don't mean to blow your mind, but you could just unclip all of your gym tags, since you have them all on a carabiner...

Petsfed 00 wrote:

I don't mean to blow your mind, but you could just unclip all of your gym tags, since you have them all on a carabiner...

Don’t worry about blowing my mind. I was taking psychedelics 20 years before you were born. 

phylp phylp wrote:

I climb with this on my harness to let other people know I’m a professional  

Edited to say, these are on my gym harness.   Kind of my version of a charm bracelet.

It always surprises me to see people with gym tags outside.  Don't people realize you can own two harnesses?

It's way more fun if there's only one at a time on your harness. For the gym that's at least 1,000 miles away.

I have no idea where any of the ones for the local gyms have got off to. They're usually gone pretty promptly.

Best, Helen