overheard at the crag: post it

Logan Peterson wrote:

El Rito, NM--where gym climbers go to die. Stash a voice recorder there over the weekend, and you'll surely get some gems. Here's one I encountered the last time I was manipulated into climbing there:

"Check it out bro. You only need 2 draws to lead anything...Okay yeah, clip that first draw onto the bolt and then put your rope in it...Now do the same thing at the second bolt....Okay, now I'm gonna lower you to the first draw.....Take that draw off and then you're gonna put it on the third bolt."

About this time, we tried to reason with the man in charge, but he cut us off with, "Dude. I know what I'm doing."

Well that’s dumb. Everyone knows you actually need 3 because you don’t want to trust your life to a single bolt. 3 draws is the actual magic number :)

Logan Peterson wrote:

El Rito, NM--where gym climbers go to die. Stash a voice recorder there over the weekend, and you'll surely get some gems. Here's one I encountered the last time I was manipulated into climbing there:

"Check it out bro. You only need 2 draws to lead anything...Okay yeah, clip that first draw onto the bolt and then put your rope in it...Now do the same thing at the second bolt....Okay, now I'm gonna lower you to the first draw.....Take that draw off and then you're gonna put it on the third bolt."

About this time, we tried to reason with the man in charge, but he cut us off with, "Dude. I know what I'm doing."

Running around pretending that you’re superior when we’ve all done way worse than this on nearly every offwidth.

There’s a big difference between ideal, suboptimal, and straight up dangerous.

Sounds like an annoying way to establish a top rope. 

Em Cos wrote:

True, some people are not cut out to be climbers. Like those who disregard their partners' wishes. Also true, we don't "have context" or "know the backstory". We don't need to. Someone is explicitly saying "I don't want to do this!" and "I hate this!" 

So speak to them, be friendly, offer help. Treat them like you'd want someone you care a lot about to be treated if they were terrified and hating something. 

True, they might reply: "Oh, thanks, but no I'm fine! This is just a strange, very public, but entirely consensual panic attack role play we're doing here. I asked my partner to continue to treat me like this no matter how much I cry. I'm totally into what's happening here. They know my safe word, and I haven't said it yet. (it's tricam!) So no help needed, but thank you so much for checking in on me!" 

More likely, they'll thank you for your help and take you up on your offer. Or, say "thanks but no, I'm fine", and they might still feel a lot better knowing someone cared. Or, they might not appreciate your offer at all, may even snap at you. That's ok. You understand they're really stressed, you don't take it personally, and move on. Maybe your kindness encourages them to try climbing again sometime, knowing that not every climber is like their partner. 

But don't act like the first scenario is remotely likely. "They might secretly be happy about what's happening" is not a valid reason not to help. Admit you can't be arsed to get involved. 

Agreed the first scenario as you have phrased it is unlikely....but we are in total agreement on gentle kindness as a response.That's just never out of place, imo, except for the rare times something demands a fast, hard, intervention. Even then? I've offered the kindness asap. Lectures can be later, if that opportunity comes up.

I will also add? 

As the person who is pretty much always the "lesser" climber?

It's my obligation to speak up. 

I tell this to new climbers, even kids, pretty often. It just isn't like trying skiing out on a bunny slope, or trying to learn to drive a stick shift. It is way too easy for beginners to get in deep water far too fast, and sometimes, that's a fatality. Getting talked into stuff is a hazard every climber faces. Yourself, or that other person, could be splat in an instant.....or you might be about to kiss off life as you know it, over the span of long, miserable hours. Days. Years.

Best, Helen

I was waiting in line to climb the Southeast Face of Emerson and saw a dude with his GF racked up with 2 cams, 5 locking carabiners, an alpine draw. I thought at best maybe they want to go light on the first pitch (only pitch you need pro on) since there was 2000 ft of climbing. The BF proceeds to solo the first pitch with the rope coiled on his back as his GF and I were left clueless at the base. About 20 minutes later and a few shouts with no response, we see the end of a rope get thrown down the face of the climb. The GF looks at us with a terrified look and said "I have no idea what to do." So my partner and I help her tie in and yell at the BF to pull up the slack. The BF has no idea what we're calling out for and continues to yell "you can climb now!!" After the slack is finally pulled, I tell the climber that she should yell "climbing" to which she does and hears no response. She eventually starts to climb a couple feet only to fall immediately after (luckily with the slack slightly taken in). Barely missing a ground fall she yells up, "I can't do this as my 2nd outdoor climb! I think this is too hard!" and then unties and just sits at the base. My partner and I were in shock.. we couldn't believe this dude just took his GF on a climbing date in the Sierras with little to no experience. After waiting another 20 minutes with no response from the BF with precious sunlight getting wasted away, I said F it and tied in and proceeded to climb. When I get to the BF, not only does he think his GF is still climbing, but his anchor for his belay is a girth hitched 1" chockstone in a parallel crack. I looked him straight in the eye and said bro you need to rappel back to your GF now and call it a day. I build an anchor and let the BF rappel off of it while my partner is shouting at him to keep his brake hand on. Good times!

@chris joe, a legit instant classic!   But was he wearing a PAS? 

"I took a quick beta burn and then got the onsight casually" "No bro a redpoint is when you can do all the moves on the climb individually" 

J W wrote:

Today, City of Rocks, Bath Rock.

I was headed back to the car when I saw a 50-something guy rope soloing on the east face. He appeared stuck, contemplating the moves through a steeper section at roughly 50’. 

I say rope soloing, but he wasn’t wearing a harness, nor was the rope attached to him in any way. It was just hanging on the rock, about five feet to his right. Not wanting to witness the accident I assume was imminent, I put my gear in the car.

As I closed the door, I glanced over, and the guy was looking at me. He slipped, hung on, then started down climbing. When he was about fifteen feet from the ground, he turned and faced out, then slid on his butt the rest of the way and bee lined to me.

“I’m a free soloist. I don’t use ropes.”

Seeing my eyes wander to the rope still hanging, “I carry that with me because I climb things that I can’t down climb. My hands don’t work. But I forgot my tent stake, so I had to use my pocket knife. It’s not as good.”

Then he pulled his phone from his pocket and walked back to the cliff. “Gotta take a picture for my Facebook, so people don’t think I’m crazy.”

LMAO! I think you got played.   

Was it this guy? publications.americanalpine…

J W wrote:

What makes you think that?

I know several very good climbers who solo City regularly. 

And have a sense of humour.

Best, H

Old lady H wrote:

LMAO! I think you got played.   

it would appear that this mystery solo climber is familiar w/ AAC accidents, and has an amazing sense of humor...    

If I ever make it to Idaho I want to hang out with OLH and her friends!

M Wolf wrote:

it would appear that this mystery solo climber is familiar w/ AAC accidents, and has an amazing sense of humor...    

If I ever make it to Idaho I want to hang out with OLH and her friends!

Just...my suspicion, lol! But, there's probably at least half a dozen people around COR who solo, lots. My friend is probably many 100s of solo pitches, by now. And knows everyone, plus decades of stories! 

H.

J W wrote:

Ok.

I guess I was wrong.

Who was it, by the way?

I admit I’m not nearly well traveled as some, and I make no claim at being good, let alone very good, but I’m nearing a decade and a half of climbing at the City, including many thousands of vertical feet of soloing. Nothing impressive, I’ll give you that. Oh, and I’ve met one or two other climbers here and there, and perhaps some fraction were inclined toward comedy.  But none of that makes me the beneficiary of some special dispensation of knowledge.

This guy wasn’t one of them. He drove from out of state and was new to the City. I have several other details about the experience I deliberately left out because they revealed what an inept climber he was, but saying so struck me as unkind and not necessary to get across the strangeness of what I “overheard at the crag.” People do, in fact, occasionally use tent stakes and all manner of unfortunate ironmongery as makeshift anchors. I just hadn’t seen it in real time before.

Look, no one stalls out Elvis-legging at 50’ for minutes on end on the tiny chance some stranger will happen in that very moment to walk around the corner, just so they can troll. The City was rather deserted, as it has been for several weeks. Until I strolled up, the guy was alone, and he knew it. Why would he crux out on 5.3 at a height that could main or kill him? Why would he wedge a pocketknife in a constriction, loop his rope over it, and actually test his weight on it, albeit gingerly? 

Trevor might go to those lengths, now that I think about it. Trevor, was this you?

It’s possible that what compelled you to question my story is that I led with “a 50-something guy,” which perhaps struck you, and the six (thus far) misguided octogenarians who liked your post, as age bashing. But I’ll remind you and the senescent mafia that a) I’m nearly 50 myself and b) the only real age bashing on mp is the exclusive club you’ve all built for yourselves in the form of the longest running micro aggression, I mean thread, in the history of mp, leaving myself and countless others in our forties to flirt with online suspension trauma. We’re too old and world weary for the millennial trolling crowd, but not seasoned enough for the 50+ group. Not seasoned enough? Perhaps that palate explains y’all’s penchant for spicy slab. We likes them old and we likes them bold.

Incidentally, Helen, when you’ve worked through the pt (hopefully successfully and hopefully soon—we’re all rooting for you), you’ll have to hop on Kevin’s and Duane’s new routes. I think you’ll enjoy them very much.

Cheers.

Edit to add: sheeeeeeeeit, if merely knowing someone who has soloed hundreds of pitches grants a person veridical insight, call me Nostra-goddamn-damus.

Edit again: no need for any gallant soul to leap to poor Helen’s defense here. She and I go back quite a way and are on rather good terms, from my perspective, at least. A rocky start, perhaps, but that grew into a mutual respect. A bit like wintering in a cave with a panther, but respect, nonetheless. Helen:   

Hey, clearly not my friend, then! He's way past 50. 

But? Since you brought up Kevin and Duane? Remember, lots of those guys are around, like Bingham, and there are others too.

My suspicion was Kim, actually. Have you met him yet? He's a hoot! And, Bath rock is one he does a lot. With skiing so shitty, and City relatively nice, it wasn't a stretch to see him showing up.

I still don't associate JW with you, yet, lol!

Oh, and if you mean Wind Dance and Da Boyz? Got to hop on those this past season, Wind Dance with Jay Goodwin, no less, and Da Boyz with others of the geriatric crew. Just crash one of the parties, kid. Youngest "add on" we had was an extremely starry eyed college kid, first trip to City....and he got to climb with FAs. 

Wind Dance and Da Boyz are super fun! 

Best to ya, H. 

The AAC article posted by Hson P is pure gold. Don't miss it because of the off-topic discussion happening up thread.

from the article, "So he began to descend using the hatchet-knife method." 

The whole thing is so good. Needs to be a cartoon.

J W wrote:

Today, City of Rocks, Bath Rock.

I was headed back to the car when I saw a 50-something guy rope soloing on the east face. He appeared stuck, contemplating the moves through a steeper section at roughly 50’. 

I say rope soloing, but he wasn’t wearing a harness, nor was the rope attached to him in any way. It was just hanging on the rock, about five feet to his right. Not wanting to witness the accident I assume was imminent, I put my gear in the car.

As I closed the door, I glanced over, and the guy was looking at me. He slipped, hung on, then started down climbing. When he was about fifteen feet from the ground, he turned and faced out, then slid on his butt the rest of the way and bee lined to me.

“I’m a free soloist. I don’t use ropes.”

Seeing my eyes wander to the rope still hanging, “I carry that with me because I climb things that I can’t down climb. My hands don’t work. But I forgot my tent stake, so I had to use my pocket knife. It’s not as good.”

Then he pulled his phone from his pocket and walked back to the cliff. “Gotta take a picture for my Facebook, so people don’t think I’m crazy.”

What does this even mean 

It means the soloist was just joking with J W. 

Today in WV- "This isn't like those old school R rated sport climbs"

J W wrote:

BL, you silly twit, have I been with you so long, that ye know me not? Are you still disillusioned by the loss of Ted’s rope? Do you, like I do, think the final line in The Outsiders was a prescient nod to said forgotten rope, and with it, all our fervent hopes? “Stay gold, Pony boy.”

You righted this bloody ship, now what? Are those actual crickets I’ve been hearing from this thread, lo these last six days?

Quick! Someone take up a post at Double Cross and lend a ready ear, for even the newly dead speak oftener than the lot of ye. Who hath ears to overhear, let them overhear.

Ryan, engage in a moment of introspection. The irony of your post will no longer be lost on you.

Discussion of a decades-old accident report is verifiably not on topic. Entertaining, yes. But hell’s bells, Turtle Doves, if mere bread and circuses (base entertainment, for the laggards in the back) be the sole criterion, nary a cross word can be leveled at old JDub.

Alas, I’ve overheard nothing else at the crag all week. I tore my mcl on Monday (at the ruddy gym, no less), and the pain, while certainly not extreme, is keeping me awake. Of course!—the dull rhythmic throbbing naturally reminded me of the unjust calumny suffered above. I’m afraid this aggression will not stand.

Thus, this nocturne.

Don’t worry. This post will self destruct before sunset, and we can all go back to contemplating the nature of silence.

I like turtles 

Overheard at the gym: "you can tell who the people who are close to professionals are because they have more stuff on their harness"

By more stuff they mean the 2 random quickdraws, quicklink, and PAS which a few not quite intermediate level climbers seem to have permanently attached to their gym harnesses for toproping 25ft 5.9s

J W wrote:

Please send me whatever thy hast smoked...;-)

Overheard at the gym today. Gym desk staff to my partner:

I saw you hang on that black route over there. Did you flash it?

My partner, thoroughly confused: no, I hung.

Gym staff person: but did you flash it to the top?