New and experienced climbers over 50 #38

I'm looking for someone to write about what it's like to start climbing in your 50s for Climbing Magazine. Did anyone in this thread start climbing in your 50s? Or do you know anyone who did who might want to write about this? Let me know and I'll reach out with more details! 

I think Todd Gordon started climbing when he was in his 50s.

Jay Goodwin wrote:

I think Todd Gordon started climbing when he was in his 50s.

I think she meant when they were 50 years old, not the 1950s.

rgold, John, et al... can we tolerate a bummer topic, briefly?   

What are our plans should we be old and left without a partner/caretaker?  I think about this a lot.  

I am hoping I would land on my feet, should Tony go first.  He seems never to think about this for himself, has no plans for any kind of incapacitation, and doesn't care.     Maybe in part it is because he has a large extended family, and he believes they would welcome him with open arms and take care of him til the very end.

I cannot imagine presenting myself at one of my kids' homes, suitcase in hand, and say "now take care of me".  Nor would I want to live in anyone's back bedroom.  I doubt I would do well living here in Joshua tree alone.  Actually, I don't think most of us are meant to be alone.  I need a beating heart somewhere nearby.  This is one reason I am reconsidering finding another puppy... my pets have saved me during times when I was way too alone.  

Poppy. My little Pom rescue.    (was a great 'beating heart')

My brother (now 90) bought long-term nursing insurance years ago... his wife is now completely incapacitated with Alzheimers, so they have in-home help 7 days a week.  It's not ideal, but at least they are covered.  What happens when he, too, can no longer take care of himself?  

My mom was placed in Assisted Living (against her will) when she was 98. It happened in the middle of the night, she was driven to a Northern Cal facility by my sister who thought it best, and she never totally understood that her house was 600 miles away.  She just wanted to go home one more time.  But she did not thrive in the new place... and she is a thriver.  She died at 102, after over 14 falls, broken bones etc... and that care cost $5500 monthly.  

Being diabetic, or for those who have had other wake-up calls... these are pressing questions.  What's the plan when the current plan no longer works?

-----

rgold, you talked about Plan B.  I am SO grateful I am still on Plan A (climbing for all I'm worth here in Joshua Tree).  But I have that nagging feeling that this time is fleeting... it will end.  I have many things I would also love to do... not as physically taxing as climbing.  Classes and studies I would love to find time for.  Some volunteer work.  Maybe more hiking, less climbing.  

I  THOUGHT last year would be my last year of 'trying hard' climbing.  I was pretty sure I was just too old to continue.  However, somehow, I'm feeling the stoke again, wondering... can I climb that crack?  Can I tackle a 5.11, just once?  So, it's still a joyful time. And knowing this won't last forever makes it that much more wonderful. 

I go back and forth between:

Is this the last Costco tooth brush bulk pack I ever buy? (will I outlive this purchase)

 vs

Today is like yesterday is like the day before that, et al. (live today as if you are immortal)

Not surprisingly (to me) - one vs the other attitude is still tightly bound to my work life. 

Maya Silver wrote:

I'm looking for someone to write about what it's like to start climbing in your 50s for Climbing Magazine. Did anyone in this thread start climbing in your 50s? Or do you know anyone who did who might want to write about this? Let me know and I'll reach out with more details! 

I started at exactly 50

Randy wrote:

I think she meant when they were 50 years old, not the 1950s.

OMFG... can't stop laughing... LOFL

Maya Silver wrote:

I'm looking for someone to write about what it's like to start climbing in your 50s for Climbing Magazine. Did anyone in this thread start climbing in your 50s? Or do you know anyone who did who might want to write about this? Let me know and I'll reach out with more details! 

We have more than a few who could just make something up that sounds good, and they write well too.

Lori Milas wrote:

rgold, John, et al... can we tolerate a bummer topic, briefly?   

What are our plans should we be old and left without a partner/caretaker?  I think about this a lot.  

rgold, you talked about Plan B.  I am SO grateful I am still on Plan A (climbing for all I'm worth here in Joshua Tree).  But I have that nagging feeling that this time is fleeting... it will end. 

First, let me emphasize what Rich said. He and I were fortunate to become mathematicians and have that ongoing interest. The last time I talked with Dave Rearick (RIP) he spoke of mathematics being the only interest that kept him going. He died a few months later at age 92. My point is that it is better to cultivate strong interests outside of climbing while you have the opportunity rather than wait and hope things fall into place when you "retire" from the sport.

As for a partner/caretaker, I would not be around today were it not for the tremendous support given me by my lovely wife Nancy (ten years younger than me) . This is a very serious issue. Rearick was partially paralyzed the last ten years or so of his life, and lived in an expensive retirement home - that kept getting more expensive each year. The last year he had 24 hour assistance, which he claimed was gutting his finances. If one doesn't have a family member volunteer to provide these services the cost can be very high, even living in one's home. Apart from where you live, in your home or a retirement home, intensive support itself can run over $60K a year. I admit, I didn't think of these things before my accident a year and a half ago. My suggestion: stay in the best physical and mental shape possible as long as possible. Try to remain ambulatory so you can do for yourself what otherwise you might have others do for you. I try to help Nancy to help me.  I am just getting comfortable walking without a cane. But I need a walker at times because of medical impairments. 

These are not pleasant topics. I apologize if some on this thread might find them depressing and unnecessary. 

Not nearly as old/wise as some in this thread, but agree about diverse interests. One reason I never identify myself as a “climber”, and try to do other stuff to stimulate mind and body - mostly hiking, skiing, racket sports, and board games. I like math too, and am curious what problems people are doing to hone mental acumen - puzzles like Sudoku (probably trivial for a trained mathematician)?

And while outliving one‘s spouse may be an unfortunate reality, you need to nurture a support network, ideally extending outside the family. The above activities keep me in contact with friends 30 years my junior. Mentoring and teaching can accomplish the same. 

It’s also probably worthwhile to plan on not living independently. While everyone seems to want to “age in place”, an isolated, independent existence isn’t necessarily the most fulfilling, or healthy. If one has the means, it may even be worthwhile to proactively join a senior community, where a spectrum of care exists as we lose functionality. And more importantly, other people.

Oh, and when my faculties really fail, I‘m trying to line up someone to give me psychedelics. Seems like a good time to start.

Permabeta wrote:

 I like math too, and am curious what problems people are doing to hone mental acumen - puzzles like Sudoku (probably trivial for a trained mathematician)?

I continue minor research in the obscure math area I started in over fifty years ago, but I haven't bothered with the formality of publishing since I retired in 2000. I used to do crossword puzzles, but as words come harder than when young I rarely do those anymore. I do enjoy Sunday Jumbles and I usually do them without writing anything down. Not too far gone I guess. 

Permabeta wrote:

It’s also probably worthwhile to plan on not living independently. While everyone seems to want to “age in place”, an isolated, independent existence isn’t necessarily the most fulfilling, or healthy. If one has the means, it may even be worthwhile to proactively join a senior community, where a spectrum of care exists as we lose functionality. And more importantly, other people.

My mother in law went into a graduated living facility.  She started out in an independent apartment but, with dementia, ended up in a 24 hour care facility.  We took her in during COVID, when she was still independent, but she broke her hip after six months and we just couldn’t do it and both work.  It was expensive but they did take good care of her. My mother is 86, lives alone, and is still sharp as a tack.  She drives the six hours from Rhode Island to Bangor Maine to visit her new great grandson. I hope that I got her genes!  We have told her that she can move in with us if she needs to but so far she is fine.

I know it’s a difficult topic, but it is absolutely a part of “the life of a climber”.  One thing I have so enjoyed are the descriptions of Rich and John, and some few not on this thread, of their lives today which are every bit as engaged and lively, just working within some physical boundaries.

This is one of those times I wish I had joined a commune. I always wondered how it might have gone if I had gotten on one of those buses in San Francisco in 1970 and headed out to build The Farm in Tennessee.  I sure kept up with the midwifery work of Ina May Gaskin, and I felt like I had my four babies under her care. Now she says she is midwifing the elders unto their deaths.

there is a group of volunteers here in Joshua Tree who support search and rescue and I’ve been thinking of joining them. They are the ones who greet visitors and help with trails and reminding people to carry water, etc. I think it might be a great way to make some new friends.

There’s also a high desert gardening club. These people are hearty types who keep planting fruits vegetables that have no chance of living.  I’ve been thinking of building a completely enclosed area in my backyard that can’t be easily breached by snakes and squirrels, and would also serve as a wind block. I could happily garden right up to the grave.

And I have seen that Harvard has 100 online courses for free.  Every single one looks great. 

I’ve changed it up for a few weeks and I’m listening to podcasts when I’m hiking instead of music. There is so much new stuff on immunology, aging, women’s and men’s health, but it all seems to distill down to exercise, balance, don’t fall, and stay engaged with life.

EDIT: Ward… wonderful and inspiring about your mom.  That’s happy news for everyone. 

My mom is 103 and lived by herself till 3 weeks shy of 100 and is now in assisted living and while expensive, she has the resources she has thrived there. She has to leave her apatrment to go to the dining hall, does exercises every day and interacts with other people where when she lived alone she was house bound. Do I want to live till 103? Hell no.

In my mid-seventies I remarked to my daughter, "If I'm lucky, I'll live another ten years.  If I'm unlucky, it will be another 20 years."

rgold wrote:

I have no special insights about aging, but my sense about life in general is that it is best not to have all your eggs in one basket, because circumstances can restrict or completely take things away from you. It is a good thing to have other passions to turn to if that happens.  I ended up with a PhD in math because an attack of (probably) Guillain-Barré left me paralyzed from the waist down for a while. It didn't seem as if climbing was something I'd ever be doing again (that turned out not to be true), but my brain was functional, so I figured maybe I should try making a life around that. Now in retirement, I still spend a few hours a day on mathematical questions.  I also have had a very long-term interest in photography, which is engrossing in a different way, and was my original interest well before I discovered climbing at 14.  So there are plans B and C as it were, in case plan A is no longer a good option.

I did some boardsailing for a while. It was very interesting to be a beginner at something at a time when I was pretty much an expert at all the other things.  Peop lle who are, in some way, in the teaching business can easily lose track of what it is like to struggle with new things.  Sucking at boardsailing helped me get back in touch with what many of my students experienced on a daily basis.

Good advice not to have all your eggs in one basket.  With age both my interests and physical abilities have  evolved.  I've found that exercise, if excessive, results in physical problems (in my case running and hang boarding)).  So, now I ski, mountain and road bike, lift weights, kayak, in addition to climbing ( no golf at the present, that's for when I'm older!).  I read a lot, both fiction and non-fiction and do all types of NYT puzzles.  Started studying Spanish at 65 and continue to study and use when traveling.  Recently encountered  limitations in three dimension mental visualization of elements of design when building furniture and cabinets, finding it necessary to construct models.  Like rgold, I suck at boardsailng and unlike him my math problems are limited to trigonometry and trying to remember how to use calculus.

Just had estate sale number 2 this weekend. No death, helped move Paul's dad into assisted living. His dad was doing so badly (sedentary, crap diet, not taking meds, which meant not managing diabetes or mental health, nuthin new or unusual with any of that), it put him in the hospital. He's doing VASTLY better now.

So, this is it, now, for that process and all the stuff it produced, and shit to deal with.

Which means I am finally reclaiming my spaces here, and getting it all back in order and on track.

Which means.

Well.

I don't wanna be the usual old lady. Or even an average American of any age. Cuz that just sucks.

It's gym time, looming soon. And gotta get back to cooking my own food. 

Questions.

Can I get that 2-3 days a week strength training with a machine circuit? Think Planet Fitness or Strive room at the YMCA. Can that eventually morph to "lift heavy", or does "heavy" really need to be free weights? Can body weight get there? Like TRX?

Aside to Lori or whomever....

Do these studies that say old people should do strength training and eat protein, etc, include females in the studies?? 

Last, I get a dexa scan Friday. Second one. Firat one, last year, put me in osteopenia. D was low. So doc put me on D, and I went back to being a regular milk drinker.

We'll see Friday.

H.

Garden alert, avert eyes if it bugs you.

Tomatoes. Taste varies, with both "sweetness" and acidity varying among the 1000s of varieties. So, those Sungold tomatoes are addictive, to some. Yellow tomatoes (and some others) are less acidic. Me, I like the bold as brass ones headed toward purple, the old varieties. Cherokee purple, black cherry. But the psychedelic ones are super fun, too, like Green Zebra, which ripens green and gold. There's some large roma types that are red, with green and (almost) metallic gold stripes when ripe! 

Grocery store tomatoes are so sad.

Old lady H wrote:

It's gym time, looming soon. 

Questions.

Can I get that 2-3 days a week strength training with a machine circuit? Think Planet Fitness or Strive room at the YMCA. Can that eventually morph to "lift heavy", or does "heavy" really need to be free weights? Can body weight get there? Like TRX?

The short answer is yes.

Doing anything is almost always better than doing nothing.

A machine circuit, while not the 'best' weight training, provides a defined, clear cut set of exercises, with a distinct beginning and end.

Free weights (and I would think TRX too) are pretty overwhelming in the options they provide.

As for 'heavy lifting' if it feels heavy to you, it is heavy :-) 

Think in the 6-8 rep range to start and maybe move down to 3-4 reps if your body can handle it and you like it. 

I love 3 rep sets but find them too demanding these days.

Don't get hurt. 

Start slow and progress with the attitude that your goal is to still be training next year, NOT that you will be lifting heavier next week.

And you really need to find a way to make it at least a little bit enjoyable. 

I lift at the climbing gym, even though the set-up isn't ideal, but because I can watch people climb during rests. 

Way more motivating than anywhere else.

One last point- if you go the machine route, get someone to show you how to adjust all the machines, and unless your memory is better than mine, take notes! 

Start slow and progress with the attitude that your goal is to still be training next year, NOT that you will be lifting heavier next week.

Yes, indeed. A common mistake for everyone is to make the set or the session the goal. Those parts of training should only be a way to reach a goal. If you have one. :)