IRRELEVANT MYSTERY SOLVED. NO INSIGHT GAINED

A while ago there was a partner finder post that had several deranged responses from somebody named Joe Chauvin (I took screenshots because I got murdery vibes). Much of what he said was unhinged, erratic, and disjointed (at best). But one sentence seemed like complete nonsense “fue pee tan tabernacle calis”. Idk why I tried to make sense of something this dumbass said, but I couldn’t let it go… what did it mean? What was he trying to say?

Well I believe I figured it out today. In quebecois french “foutre putain tabarnak calice” is a string of vulgarities. I believe a combination of him misspelling and the phone autocorrecting is the culprit.

Good day

Having a Quebecoise ex-wife, I understood the last 2 misspellings. Says something about the history of a people when most of the swear words come from the Church. Below is a video that encapsulates the plight of our mystery man. Don't miss the crescendo at the end!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMyRCmsHn6Q

??????

Yessss this is the type of MP investigation we need. Care to translate? 

There is a saying that reminds me of this deranged lunatic: "You can't outthink a moron". Meaning that arguing with this guy is futile - it won't work because logic/reason mean nothing to him.

I enjoyed this saga. Ha

Answering the important questions, love it

grug g wrote:

Yessss this is the type of MP investigation we need. Care to translate? 

Direct translation is something like, "fucking whore tabernacle chalice."  (Foutre is hard to translate directly. It gets used as the curse word in expressions like: don't give a damn; Don't give a fuck; Go fuck yourself. But it also means the vulgar "come" all by itself. I also speak European French not North American French, so they might have further nuances that I'm not aware of.

A more meaningful translation (in American English) might be, "fucking bitch Jesus Christ Goddamn."  Tabarnak and calis aren't "hard" swear words and they get used like our similarly religious equivalents.

Sparkington TheThird wrote:

A more meaningful translation (in American English) might be, "fucking bitch Jesus Christ Goddamn."  Tabarnak and calis aren't "hard" swear words and they get used like our similarly religious equivalents.

My understanding of Quebec French as an anglo-Canadian from Ontario is that, in fact, the religious swear words are the "hard"swear words in Quebec French.  So, the "softer" part is the "fucking bitch" and the "harder" would be the chalice, tabernacle (and, not used in the quote, but used in Quebec French swearing, sacrament).

David Gibbs wrote:

My understanding of Quebec French as an anglo-Canadian from Ontario is that, in fact, the religious swear words are the "hard"swear words in Quebec French.  So, the "softer" part is the "fucking bitch" and the "harder" would be the chalice, tabernacle (and, not used in the quote, but used in Quebec French swearing, sacrament).

I'm guessing your understanding is more nuanced than mine. I'll defer to you.

David Gibbs wrote:

My understanding of Quebec French as an anglo-Canadian from Ontario is that, in fact, the religious swear words are the "hard"swear words in Quebec French.  

Exact. And even with religious swears there's a gradation. e.g., tabarnak > sacrament > caliss.

So, the "softer" part is the "fucking bitch" and the "harder" would be the chalice, tabernacle (and, not used in the quote, but used in Quebec French swearing, sacrament).

Yup. "Fuck" is pretty tame in Quebec.

I still need to watch myself after almost 15 years in the US.

I don't know French Canadian or any French at all really, but I had to go to Montreal for business during a cold snap in February one year, and I somehow uttered this very phrase as I got out of the cab, one second before my larynx froze solid.

“fue pee tan tabernacle calis!":

Since we have some Canadian language and linguistic experts on this thread, I’ll ask a question. Years ago I once climbed with a Canadian guy in Yosemite and when he was having a hard time on a pitch he would yell out, “Fuck me dead!” Is/was that a common expression, or just his personal stress reliever?

Daniel Joder wrote:

Since we have some Canadian language and linguistic experts on this thread, I’ll ask a question. Years ago I once climbed with a Canadian guy in Yosemite and when he was having a hard time on a pitch he would yell out, “Fuck me dead!” Is/was that a common expression, or just his personal stress reliever?

I have heard “fuck me dead” before. Also a few other variations: “fuck me sideways” or “ fuck me running”. I’m not a Canadian but grew up in New England.

Love where this went! I’ve never heard of religious specific swears before. 

Maybe we need to have a general, stickied, swearing translation thread, for all these important questions that keep us up at night.

I used to work with an old dude who worked in pharmaceutical formulation and he had some swearing whenever he got hurt. I think he said it was Chinese? "Chingao!"

Murdery Vibes? Elaborate please.

Marc-Andre Giasson wrote:

Yup. "Fuck" is pretty tame in Quebec.

Truly, Quebec is the francophone Australia.

Nathan Doyle wrote:

Murdery Vibes? Elaborate please.

Murdery vibes is when you get a feeling that somebody is maybe capable of murder for some reason. 

Sam The Average Climber wrote:

Murdery vibes is when you get a feeling that somebody is maybe capable of murder for some reason. 

Thanks Sam! I've since received more context as to why the vibes were being described that way and it makes more sense now.

I wish that more of his posts were still visible. I laughed so hard at some of them. "I'm the most dangerous man alive" and "my climbing partner is Japanese, so I guess that makes me a threat to society" are personal favorites