Dumb things other climbers have said

ROC wrote:I recently saw this one on an an unnamed users profile on this site. Leads C2 - Follows C3 Really? That's it? You couldn't possibly climb the rope on a harder route? Ha ha ha.

Funny, buy maybe an accident, or not wanting to take a risk jugging on shitty anchors?

Andrew Shoemaker wrote: Just reading that made my testicles shoot back up.

+10000

"Technique will only get you to v3, after that it's all strength"
Coming from the guy who can climb v7 campus problems but couldn't climb a techy v2 to save himself.

"You're off belay"

"Like, totally off?"

"Well, no..."

I got one from this past weekend at the Red.

Unknown climber, talking to another unknown: "Yeah man, I see a lot of scary people out here. People that you watch and cringe at. They should really figure out what the hell they're doing before coming out here."

I look over and see that he's just holding the GriGri cam down while paying out slack (with no hand on the brake strand), not even paying attention to or looking at his climber.

Joe Virtanen wrote:I look over and see that he's just holding the GriGri cam down while paying out slack (with no hand on the brake strand), not even paying attention to or looking at his climber.

That's pretty common practice. I don't use a gri gri but I see people doing that everywhere I go. Amazing how lazy people can be.

this guy setting up a TR to my right drops a carabiner from the top of a 50ft wall and consequently yells CAAAR-AAAA-BIIIINEEER!!! I thought it was pretty odd because the locker slammed into the ground before he finished yelling the word.

It so happened to be Saint Patty's Day so I made some lame pun to the belayer (who was waiting for the TR to be set) about drinking "water on the rocks."

I understand its not a very good joke, but she sneers and in a condesending tone says "I'm not into that whole St. Patricks Day thing"

Neither am I. Why the fuck do you think I'm out climbing instead of at the pub celebrating?

''Don't fall here'' is probably the stupidest thing you can say as a belayer when the climber clearly knows that falling at that spot would be bad and needs confidence, not more doubts to pull the move and not fall.

Yet I hear it often...

Mike Ben wrote:I cracked another Bud and drove off laughing all the way to hell.

I don't know about the dumbest, but this is the most awesome.

Captain Fastrousers wrote:Much funnier (and probably much more constructive) to talk about the stupid things we ourselves have said.

I have been calling Garter snakes a "Gardener" snake up until I was corrected just a week ago!!!111

I'm at a gym for a few hours. I notice a climber teaching his GF how to belay for the first time.

Then I see him getting ready to lead. I ask him if he wants a catch. He said...nah it's ok...she has done this twice and is getting good at it.

I watched the sketchist lead belay I have seen in a long time. He was climbing a rather easy route...but he would have been in a world of trouble if he fell.

At least it was a grigri. But with as much slack as she had out and how she was using her brake hand...geez.

"I can boulder like v3 and v4 so I am going to buy a rack and be a sponsored alpine climber. 5.11 5.12 alpine shouod be no problem!"
Said my buddy who has never led a single pitch 5.11 sport climb. I told him sweet let me know how that works out.

Not the dumbest thing said. But the dumbest thing Ive ever seen. Was belaying my friend the other day on a route next to two other guys. The one guy was following and cleaning gear as he went. I'm not paying too much attention to the other climbers b/c I am focusing on my partner. All of a sudden I #3 cam comes hurling down and slams the ground less than a foot from where I was standing! No warning or anything. I look up at the guy, who then proceeds to yell rock...after its already hit the ground inches from my skull. Luckily I was wearing a helmet and standing where I was. Needless to say, I was pissed and let him have it!!

I was climbing at the gym in Evergreen, and saw a lady tying in her 10 year old kid with a square knot. I went over and told her she needs to use an eight. Her reply- "No, this is the way i do it, it works way better."

jake h wrote:I was climbing at the gym in Evergreen, and saw a lady tying in her 10 year old kid with a square knot. I went over and told her she needs to use an eight. Her reply- "No, this is the way i do it, it works way better."

haha, i know exactly who you are talking about! i use to work there and that fucking lady has been asked to leave that wall numerous times. my favorite moment with her was when she was just using the tie down sling in the floor to belay. she wasnt even wearing a harness and she would continue with her circuit while her kid was having trouble with a section. once the kid got about five feet or so above the section the mother would run over and feed the slack through the gri gri then go back to her machines. I have told her in front of her kid and many other kids that ignorance like that kill people or breaks a shit load of bones. im surprised she still is allowed to be within 10 feet of that pinnacle

"My uncle used to climb with an olympic climber."

Dr. Ellis D. Funnythoughts wrote: haha, i know exactly who you are talking about! i use to work there and that fucking lady has been asked to leave that wall numerous times. my favorite moment with her was when she was just using the tie down sling in the floor to belay. she wasnt even wearing a harness and she would continue with her circuit while her kid was having trouble with a section. once the kid got about five feet or so above the section the mother would run over and feed the slack through the gri gri then go back to her machines. I have told her in front of her kid and many other kids that ignorance like that kill people or breaks a shit load of bones. im surprised she still is allowed to be within 10 feet of that pinnacle

That's crazy. I've had gyms get on my case about not dressing a figure eight properly, and this place is letting this woman get away with this?! Are they just blind to the liability or do they have crazy good insurance?

Me: Can you clean the draws at the top?
Friend: Yea, no problem.
Me: You sure you know what to do?
Friend: Yea, I've led plenty of times

[climbing] (70m rope stretcher)

Friend: "Umm...How do I get the rope through the chains with it tied to my harness!?"

Me: Forget it and come down. I'll climb it again!

"How hard could it be? It's bolted..."

"You can go for the onsight next try."

Toby B wrote: That's crazy. I've had gyms get on my case about not dressing a figure eight properly, and this place is letting this woman get away with this?! Are they just blind to the liability or do they have crazy good insurance?

Pretty shitty insurance i believe. its kinda funny though, you have to pay ten bucks to get "certified " there, and you HAVE to (toprope) belay with a gri gri that is tied down to the floor. Which brings me to my favorite quote by the head setter:

"If you weight that rope one more time, im lowering you! Your gonna break the rope!"

He has a strong belief that ropes aren't meant for body weight.

Maybe not dumb, but funny-- one of my climbing partners overheard the following:
Guy to girl stemming up a corner--'just spread your legs and trust the rubber"
Girl in response: "That's what they all say"