El Cap doubled in size and a 7 year old just “climbed” it….

Climbin Shittwrote:

I understand your point to Kevin, but we just happen to be talking about a male who makes videos on masculinity and what it means to be a “real man”. Someone who says their film will be about real men raising boys to become men. Pointing out that his behavior directly contradicts this is very relevant. 

Gender roles aside his behavior is actually super similar to those weird pagent moms. And managing the criticism while talking in the third person from his kids Instagram accounts is in the upper stratosphere of cringe. I wonder how the guy hauling felt knowing part of the 300lb load was for boardgames for photoshoot props and not water and food as they’re getting dehydrated on day 6 on the wall

And besides learning how to be real men,  another ween song comes to mind -

Bless the father, bless the son

Cross your heart 'cause you're the one

Collectin' moon-beams in the mornin'

Curvy sticks and wooden poles

Assistin' you in pluggin' holes

Plug them holes 'til you see straight through to the mind's eye

Think about it, turn around

And go back to the quiet sound

Of Jim and Dan prancin' 'round the pool

You were the fool, and I feel sorry for you

You were the fool, but there's something you can do

You were the fool

Seen Ween bunches of times, they have a song for every situation. Best thread drift ever 

"I saw you and Danny (Joey Evermore) walking yesterday, he's a fucker and you're a fucker too!"

"Nan, a table for one. You think that I could be invited to come?"

Anyways, gotta get my Bananas and blow in me, got a long day of Pumping for the man. Maybe later I'll Put the coke on my di*k to help with the mid day slump 

How does he afford his rock and roll lifestyle? Is it him or his parents in this income tax bracket?

Wake up as Rocco/Paul/John Doe/JimJohnJacobJingleHeimerSchmidt:

1. Porter Joe & crew's gear to base of El Cap
2. Fix lines all the way up The Nose for minimal compensation or just haul it all or god knows what but be an active part of it
3. Lie to Michael Vaill and say you didn't do the above and/or didn't know what you were part of
4. Grant Sam McIlwaine an interview conditioned on anonymity and share enough details to confirm you absolutely knew what you were doing
5. Get shat on in a post by Joe claiming that you didn't do anything but porter gear to the base
6. Hide from the ire of the climbing community 

Wake up as Joe:

1. Ramble incoherently about men being men
2. Grant Sam McIlwaine an interview and then post later disputing a bunch of what was written based on your own interview with her
3. Discredit Rocco/BillyBob/JimmyNeutron and say he didn't do anything but porter gear and that he wasn't responsible for guiding or safety and that you were, while also acknowledging in said article that you had 9 people involved in this including yourself
4. Unlawfully conduct another jug haul with a huge group while breaking more rules but F it, it's for the 'gram baby
5. Pull YOSAR resources away from a lifesaving operation but whatever, those are minor details because we made Good Morning America 
6. Note that there's more coming from your exceptional team but you haven't and can't name them

This whole thing sucks, again.

I can picture Joe’s first moments waking up in the morning..

“Alexa, tell me about my rad kid being the youngest to climb El Capitan.”

“According to Climbing Magazine..”

“Alexa shut up!!”

Adam Flemingwrote:

Joe posted his "first" response to Sam's article. Here's the text copied from his FB page.

lmfao this was almost certainly written entirely with AI

I doubt it was AI, bro just can't write. If you're a midwit chud who sucks at writing you come out sounding like a chatbot. 

Chris Mwrote:

I doubt it was AI, bro just can't write. If you're a midwit chud who sucks at writing you come out sounding like a chatbot. 

Unfortunately there are a lot of midwit chuds in the world who willing provide text for OpenAI / Anthropic / Google / Meta / Microsoft et al to use in stochastic recursive auto-complete.

Seems that this thread has reached the point that the picture pretty much sums it up.

p.s. if anybody can tell me the best bouldering for a very mid and very out of shape climber visiting Telluride and walking distance from the Jagged Edge shop, I'd be much obliged.  Otherwise I'm gonna just have to go for a hike.

Salamanizer Skiwrote:

There, fixed that for ya! 

Remember, there's always a cop in the mix

PWZwrote:

Remember, there's always a cop in the mix

I was wondering what was up with the ss poster.  Makes sense now.

I’d rather more people press this elf fuck on the permits. Regardless of whether or not anyone was paid, he didn’t have a wilderness climbing permit for a party over 8, and didn’t have a commercial filming permit for a party over 5. As I understand it, the ascent was illegal. YNP should put him in jail where he’s just about the right size to actually serve a purpose. 

Salamanizer Skiwrote:

There, fixed that for ya! 

Mr.Richard Smoker I presume? Go home, you're drunk again.

PWZwrote:

Remember, there's always a cop in the mix

Just stating the facts. You don’t have to agree with them. 

Jeremy Dwrote:

Unfortunately there are a lot of midwit chuds in the world who willing provide text for OpenAI / Anthropic / Google / Meta / Microsoft et al to use in stochastic recursive auto-complete.

Seems that this thread has reached the point that the picture pretty much sums it up.

p.s. if anybody can tell me the best bouldering for a very mid and very out of shape climber visiting Telluride and walking distance from the Jagged Edge shop, I'd be much obliged.  Otherwise I'm gonna just have to go for a hike.

Depending on what 'walking distance' means to you, the Mine boulders or Illium are your best options. Depending on when you're gonna be there, I'll be there some days for work and could probably drive you to to boulders and climb with you some evenings if you want that. Let me know if you do

Tina the Trad Wife's Alpha Male Climbing Camp.  

Instantly thought of this whole debacle when I saw this. Must be where JE learned to climb. 

Nick Niebuhrwrote:

Depending on what 'walking distance' means to you, the Mine boulders or Illium are your best options. Depending on when you're gonna be there, I'll be there some days for work and could probably drive you to to boulders and climb with you some evenings if you want that. Let me know if you do

Thanks!  I'm looking at the Mine Boulders.  I do have a car if I need it, but I prefer not to give up my parking space at the hotel.  Right now, if I get the motiviation to go, it is looking like Wednesday.  Thursday evening is also a possibility.  Leavin town on Friday morning.

Chris Bwrote:

Joe being a creep should be one topic the entire climbing community can rally behind

It all boils down to this ^

Climbin Shittwrote:

I’d rather more people press this elf fuck on the permits. Regardless of whether or not anyone was paid, he didn’t have a wilderness climbing permit for a party over 8, and didn’t have a commercial filming permit for a party over 5. As I understand it, the ascent was illegal. YNP should put him in jail where he’s just about the right size to actually serve a purpose. 

Pardon my ignorance, but how is Joe allowed to move forward with producing and releasing his $500,000 feature film that he's fundraising money for if his party didn't have a wilderness permit for a party over 8, and money was exchanged for guiding/portering services?  Couldn't NPS technically ban/bar him from doing so?

Dillon Brownwrote:

Pardon my ignorance, but how is Joe allowed to move forward with producing and releasing his $500,000 feature film that he's fundraising money for if his party didn't have a wilderness permit for a party over 8, and money was exchanged for guiding/portering services?  Couldn't NPS technically ban/bar him from doing so?

I don't know if you've noticed but for the past decade laws in U.S. seem to be increasingly meaningless for White Guys who support MAGA