Eldo sucks AKA the crag blasphemer's thread

i had a world class stack of pancakes yesterday. i'll never eat another tuna salad sandwich.

ps discredit my opinion, i've never climbed 5.12.

T-Wall is unique for the steepness. But there are a ton of killer cracks. In Pursuit of Excellence, Golden Locks, Razor Worm, Digital Macabe, Crack Attack, Finger-Locking' Good, Precious Ore The list goes on and on and on.

How did we get so off topic here? Perhaps I should bring the forum back on course... What is your opinion (regarding a crag), about everyone else's opinion (if a crag is "World Class", or if we get down to it, decent enough to touch your holy hands)? Please feel free to spew one sided nonsense, get defensive, or state your opinion as though it were indisputable fact.... If all else fails, please write a note, send a text, befriend and message via facebook, articulate anonymously on MP, send smoke signals, sit on a "big bro", or yell really loud at mother earth and tell her that she really fucked up on "said crag" and that you could have designed it much better. Thank you!

You guys are funny!

What DOES "suck" is our supposed climbing "community"!

It used to be at least somewhat of a brotherhood/ sisterhood---NOW??
Well, no we're all just a bunch of dumb jocks playing "Lightsaber" with our half-flaccid COCKS!

I'm goin climbin' -- at the WORLD CLASS Boulder Rock Club!

Is the splatte world class?

Hell no it's not world class. Too spread out, too hard to get to, up until recently there was hardly any info on most of the areas, everything is south facing so the best season is when it's generally hard to get good weather window. Splatte sucks! Everyone should do their best to avoid it like the plague.

Hell no it's not world class. Too spread out, too hard to get to, up until recently there was hardly any info on most of the areas, everything is south facing so the best season is when it's generally hard to get good weather window. Splatte sucks! Everyone should do their best to avoid it like the plague.

The place totally sucks.

Recently did a North America tour and the most overrated was Devils tower wy. Not sure why no one has said that on here, you guys infact say it meets or exceeds reputation. Took me one week to climb it out, the cracks are painful, it's way shorter than it looks, every route was one long pitch of the exact same move followed by 2 chunky pitches of shit rock with a swarm of flying ants all over the top, add the gumbys, the wacky locals and the fat tourist onlookers and you have a world class chose pile. Looks good in Sci-fi movies and that's about it.

There that's what this thread is all about. Keep it coming.

Buff Johnson wrote:The place totally sucks.

Nothing to see there. Move along.

Tony B wrote: The Spot is much better... (grin)

I dunno man...the crash pads are all old, crusty, and chalky as fuck! The whole highschool hangout scene is lame too!
Then, you have that huuuge, UP HILL hike from the parking lot to the front counter!!! What the hell??? havent they every heard of Escalators?!?
Then, you got "spinners" all over the place...COME ON setters, git yer asses to work...bust out those Makitas and tighten up that orange V4!!!!
I just can't even go there anymore....I twisted my ankle last time on my way to the bathroom and they had to call in Rocky Mountain Rescue to come litter my gumby ass outta there!! Now I'm Banned!

Oh well, doesnt matter....I couldnt even get Cell phone service there anyway.

Just my "2 cents"...

I pwned Rosy Crusifiction on gear as a single pitch with Lukas belaying. Very dangerous, but it’s a classic in a bad way it looks like. Falling in the traverse on lead could be devastating for a party, but what is up with the soft-anchor patch? You can’t leave pull-drawlls like that.. keinen-Klimben lawyer as Lukas and I pwned, but this climb being .. :: ForumEnde - ReptoidzScarlatt

Bob Kamps was a big Devils Lake fan. But then he loved the South Dakota Needles too, so there's no accounting for taste.  

To my surprise, I'm down with Abel Jones' impression of Devils Tower. But, I have had some memorable times there. I followed Mike Caldwell (Tommy's dad) up the money pitch on Two Moons Over Huwlett. It's a long pitch of continuous .11c (?), same move over and over. Mike had four tcu's the right size, and leapfrogged his pro all the way up. When he was at the belay there wasn't a single piece on the whole pitch.

One time Larry and I got high and watched the prairie dogs in their big field across from the campground. Their pranks are some of the funniest things I've ever seen. I laughed until I couldn't breathe. It was a workout, my abs hurt the next day.

There used to be an official looking sign on top that said "No Climbing Beyond This Point."

There are a couple of challenging routes there by Todd Skinner and others. There's one I had to work hard for, climbs the arete of one of those columns.

I see Abel's point. If it was my local crag I'd be lookin' to hit the road after about three months.

But the place I love and hate is Tahquitz/Suicide. I hate Tahquitz, and I love Suicide (so to speak). Tahquitz has a few great climbs, Vampire, Green Arch, The Edge, Open Book (for the history if nothing else). Unfortunately I've witnessed more serious incidents and fatalities there than anywhere else I've climbed. I've helped carry broken and dead climbers down from there more than once. So what's the deal? Most of the routes are semi-alpine in style, and the combo of route finding and loose rock is not a recipe for success when the crag is in close proximity to a huge metropolitan area full of gumby's.

Suicide Rock, on the other hand, is made of God's own granite. It's unreal.

Kristian Solemwrote:

But the place I love and hate is Tahquitz/Suicide. I hate Tahquitz, and I love Suicide (so to speak). Tahquitz has a few great climbs, Vampire, Green Arch, The Edge, Open Book (for the history if nothing else). Unfortunately I've witnessed more serious incidents and fatalities there than anywhere else I've climbed. I've helped carry broken and dead climbers down from there more than once. So what's the deal? Most of the routes are semi-alpine in style, and the combo of route finding and loose rock is not a recipe for success when the crag is in close proximity to a huge metropolitan area full of gumby's.

Suicide Rock, on the other hand, is made of God's own granite. It's unreal.

I totally share this unpopular opinion.

Kristian Solemwrote:

Bob Kamps was a big Devils Lake fan. But then he loved the South Dakota Needles too, so there's no accounting for taste.  

To my surprise, I'm down with Abel Jones' impression of Devils Tower. But, I have had some memorable times there. I followed Mike Caldwell (Tommy's dad) up the money pitch on Two Moons Over Huwlett. It's a long pitch of continuous .11c (?), same move over and over. Mike had four tcu's the right size, and leapfrogged his pro all the way up. When he was at the belay there wasn't a single piece on the whole pitch.

One time Larry and I got high and watched the prairie dogs in their big field across from the campground. Their pranks are some of the funniest things I've ever seen. I laughed until I couldn't breathe. It was a workout, my abs hurt the next day.

There used to be an official looking sign on top that said "No Climbing Beyond This Point."

There are a couple of challenging routes there by Todd Skinner and others. There's one I had to work hard for, climbs the arete of one of those columns.

I see Abel's point. If it was my local crag I'd be lookin' to hit the road after about three months.

But the place I love and hate is Tahquitz/Suicide. I hate Tahquitz, and I love Suicide (so to speak). Tahquitz has a few great climbs, Vampire, Green Arch, The Edge, Open Book (for the history if nothing else). Unfortunately I've witnessed more serious incidents and fatalities there than anywhere else I've climbed. I've helped carry broken and dead climbers down from there more than once. So what's the deal? Most of the routes are semi-alpine in style, and the combo of route finding and loose rock is not a recipe for success when the crag is in close proximity to a huge metropolitan area full of gumby's.

Suicide Rock, on the other hand, is made of God's own granite. It's unreal.

People just have boners for height, so Tah wins there, but move for move Suicide stands above all.

Sundance/Sundike, Disco Jesus, Ironcross, Caliente, Untickable...I could go on and on, it's incredible and funny thing is once the weather gets good for Sui people bail for JT, fukn sport climbers, all of 'em.

Dr Nathaniel Scarlett Johansson-Foxwrote:

I pwned Rosy Crusifiction on gear as a single pitch with Lukas belaying. Very dangerous, but it’s a classic in a bad way it looks like. Falling in the traverse on lead could be devastating for a party, but what is up with the soft-anchor patch? You can’t leave pull-drawlls like that.. keinen-Klimben lawyer as Lukas and I pwned, but this climb being .. :: ForumEnde - ReptoidzScarlatt

Is this even english? Holy crap zombie thread! You really dug an 8 year old thread out of its grave to spout some nonsense?

In the spirit of the thread  Smith is a mud pile in the desert overrun with zoo animals. 

Tradibanwrote:

People just have boners for height, so Tah wins there, but move for move Suicide stands above all.

Sundance/Sundike, Disco Jesus, Ironcross, Caliente, Untickable...I could go on and on, it's incredible and funny thing is once the weather gets good for Sui people bail for JT, fukn sport climbers, all of 'em.

Sounds like you guys are trying to ruin Suicide Rock for the people that love it.

Jim Twrote:

Sounds like you guys are trying to ruin Suicide Rock for the people that love it.

I wouldn't worry about it Jim. Real climbing isn't in vogue anymore anyway.

Eldo? Lol. Anyone who has spent some time in CA knows we have the worst chosspiles. Joshua Tree? Beautiful location, stable winter weather, easy access, but have you ever got off a route at Josh and said "Oh man that was really good!"? No you haven't because its a goddamn junkpile. That's the top of the desert rock foodchain though. Don't even get me started on the Alabama Hills. Tons of people drive 4-6 hours to climb there every weekend, even in the summers when its 100+ F during the day. WTF is wrong with these people? The rock is literally like someone took sharp gravel mixed in with kitty litter and added some Elmer's glue. I have never climbed a route where I didn't kick a foot hold off, granted I have only climbed like 5 routes there because its total trash. Shark Fin arete might be the most photographed climb in CA and I even broke holds off that! There's a goddamn flake so poorly attached it literally flaps in the wind and its covered in chalk. How does it have 4 stars?!? So what if Eldo has some bands of choss and gets a bit crowded on the weekends? Come to CA if you want to see the real garbage. 

Kristian Solemwrote:

Bob Kamps was a big Devils Lake fan. But then he loved the South Dakota Needles too, so there's no accounting for taste.  

To my surprise, I'm down with Abel Jones' impression of Devils Tower. But, I have had some memorable times there. I followed Mike Caldwell (Tommy's dad) up the money pitch on Two Moons Over Huwlett. It's a long pitch of continuous .11c (?), same move over and over. Mike had four tcu's the right size, and leapfrogged his pro all the way up. When he was at the belay there wasn't a single piece on the whole pitch.

One time Larry and I got high and watched the prairie dogs in their big field across from the campground. Their pranks are some of the funniest things I've ever seen. I laughed until I couldn't breathe. It was a workout, my abs hurt the next day.

There used to be an official looking sign on top that said "No Climbing Beyond This Point."

There are a couple of challenging routes there by Todd Skinner and others. There's one I had to work hard for, climbs the arete of one of those columns.

I see Abel's point. If it was my local crag I'd be lookin' to hit the road after about three months.

But the place I love and hate is Tahquitz/Suicide. I hate Tahquitz, and I love Suicide (so to speak). Tahquitz has a few great climbs, Vampire, Green Arch, The Edge, Open Book (for the history if nothing else). Unfortunately I've witnessed more serious incidents and fatalities there than anywhere else I've climbed. I've helped carry broken and dead climbers down from there more than once. So what's the deal? Most of the routes are semi-alpine in style, and the combo of route finding and loose rock is not a recipe for success when the crag is in close proximity to a huge metropolitan area full of gumby's.

Suicide Rock, on the other hand, is made of God's own granite. It's unreal.

I was hiking up the trail the day that woman’s arm was chopped off on I think Sahara Terror.   I went back once more in 1993 to climb the Vampire and got caught in a horrendous lightning storm while on the Bat Crack.  I have not been back since.   Suicide on the other hand holds lots of great memories.