Looking for flammable footwear.

Just wrap your feet in duct tape. You might then be able to slide your feet into your climbing shoes. A little sweaty maybe, but think of the ankle support.

I've done a few approaches (where you top out at your packs) with my feet taped with climbing tape. You can pull it off at the base, wad it up and burn it, or pull on climbing shoes over it. Works fairly well if that's all you are concerned about, and it has more traction than duct tape.

Wrap your feet in weed and then smoke it right before the climb. You'll lead two grades higher.

If you handstand walk to the base of the climb the only approach gear you need will be some leather gloves (lightweight and packable).

i always enjoy using something once, and then burning it. it shows my true human nature.

suck it up, and carry the friggin weight. it might make you slightly stronger. talking about tarahumara, bring some minimal shoes like five fingers or something.

Just an aside, I had to drive the Crysler van today. God, I hate Cryslers.

How's the tar baby working out, John?

johnL wrote:Jeff, shut up.

no, you! weaaaa.

other than telling you to suck it up, which you should, i also gave you good advice about minimal, light footwear.

you really think that making a shoe you can burn is a genius idea? it sounds like a lot of work for something you will burn.

The genius of John's idea is that it's stoopider than anything anyone else has ever come up with. That takes Real Genius™. Taking this subject serious is dumb.

Fuck, adding a "z" to a word to make it funny sucks. I retract that shit.

johnL is brilliant! Don't be so jealous.

Jeff is upset bc he burns his rope and climbing shoes after routes with a walk off and feels like you ripped off his idea. Am I warm?

Good thing you trimmed your Bermuda toenails to cut down on weight.

Edit to add: Okay, so far it looks like a first grader's art project with the sloppy Elmer's glue, and dirty crayon, and all; Not going to be impressed until you can show your fellow MPers some stone knapping skillz as your feet catch fire. Think along the lines of a quality Cirque Du Soleil performance for the viewers, not a Circus- Circus clown.

My two cents- John your a lazy bastard...... they are fucking sandals for christ sake. Last time I checked my tevas were not made of lead. and if your bro/sis is wearing his/her La Sportiva Nepal EVO GTX mountaineering boots on the approach tell him/her/it to carry their own shoes.
Otherwise- walmart.com/ip/Op-Men-s-Spo…
They may be too heavy for you at 10 ounces..... Just food for thought.
If you are concerned about sandal weight- I would say skip the climb do some cross training and then go back once you can carry the extra 1/2# of weight. Otherwise maybe look into some other sports..... Like power walking... fit yourself into some spandex and get that vagina some exercise. No offense to those with vaginas.

Gigi +1 for toenail weight..... Obviously he needs to cut every yoctogram (1x 10^-24grams) worth of weight to be streamlined enough to get to the top. So with the toenails and sandals hes saving maybe .0000000007grams worth the weight.

Your prototype is beginning to look marketable. Once you get it down you could begin by making up a batch and selling them off your tailgate on the rim. That is until the tourists begin to report fires in the canyon bottom and the rangers become suspicious. Oh my gosh, policy review, interagency exchanges, environmental impact statement, public comment. 2 years hence, new trailhead signage:

Attention Rock Climbers

Fires Not Permitted In Canyon Bottom
All Descent Sandals Must Be Carried Out Or Constructed Of Biodegradable Materials And Buried At Least 6 Inches Below The Surface

I would blur the Evolve and Crayola crayon logos in those pictures until you get some product placement money contracts in place. I know an agent you can contact, too.

James Beissel wrote:Bunny slippers + stealth dot + trained falcon

Hahahahahahaha

johnL wrote: I could shove a carbon fiber dildo up my ass. It's really light and maybe even expensive, that doesn't necessarily mean I want it there though. Maybe it's a lifestyle thing, those of you who know me know I don't amass too much shit. I think I look at gear as a carbon fiber dildo, if I can get the job done with less of it up my ass, I think I'm happier.

Classic!

John,
I used to find you annoying. Now, I do not after that last post of pure awesomeness.

I know it means a lot to you.

Glad to hear you are searching for the lightest and most technological dildos while creating this footwear. Well done!

I have a pair of vibram five fingers and think they would be perfect. Of course you wouldnt want to burn them but they are super light weight, pack down to nothing, and have good grip for the approach. You could even just use them as climbing shoes they are that good.

Dexter, John L hates to repeat himself and would suggest that you read the entire thread. He has lighter footwear than Sanuks and isn't interested in Five Fingers or anything like that. Just a warning.