What do you tell non-climbers what your crash pad is?

This winter in Red Rocks I had an older woman ask me if it was an easel for painting. "There sure are a lot of you artists out here!", she said.

A bed for shooting a film

Not mine, but the best I've heard:
''Oh, we're part of the narcoleptic hiking club.'

^ better then mine

climbing friend,

it is for resting your hands, because you don't always have a grigri nearby to inappropriately and contrary to manufacturer instructions indefinitely rest your wee little handsie on the device and cam.

We tell people it's a mattress to film gay porn on. Hahahaha 

three piece organ. 

My personal favorites:

Sex doll carrier