satirical musings about eastern climbers

you really need some tricams on that rack

^+1... Tri-cams are the greatest pro ever invented... Ever... Who cares about what your follower has to deal with to clean them.

Ryan M Moore wrote:^+1... Tri-cams are the greatest pro ever invented... Ever... Who cares about what your follower has to deal with to clean them.

lol not that hard.. stab them in the tail and out they go.

"- Wearing climbing helmet right from the car, even though it's a 1/2 mile hike to the base of the climb. Also fully harnessed and racked up for the hike in. "

This is too funny. I used to hang out with a friend from New York, and one of the first times we went climbing together he picked me up with helmet and harness already on! Wouldn't be the last time, either.

Climbing friend,

There once was a climber from the gunks
who said man I hate these gym punks
shirtless grigri
belly so petite
hexes and pitons aren't junk!

Jared Moore wrote:"- Wearing climbing helmet right from the car, even though it's a 1/2 mile hike to the base of the climb. Also fully harnessed and racked up for the hike in. " This is too funny. I used to hang out with a friend from New York, and one of the first times we went climbing together he picked me up with helmet and harness already on! Wouldn't be the last time, either.

I watched a guy at Miguels play basketball with harness and draws still on his harness..... not sure about that kid

True Easterner - 40-minute approach is WICKED long.

Bunch of noobs on this thread... there are pleanty of climbs where it completly makes sense to rack up in the parking lot. pretty much any summer rock rt @ cannon that tops out . don't even get me started about how over rated tricams are... ;)

you're a noob

whats really funny is watching noobs climb moby with a bunch of tricams and hexes and 50 liter packs in the summer time :)

has ever tested positive for lyme disease

Momoface wrote:Getting defensive about the reputations of the mountains in the north east.

231 MPH wind speed! :)

Eric Engberg wrote: +1 And ignoring this has made what mountain the deadliest in the US?

That moniker might not prove what you are hoping. It could have the most total fatalities because there are fewer options for the large population living close enough to make it a destination. Or if the measure is fatalities per attempt, maybe it just gets attempted by more unprepared people?

MojoMonkey wrote: 231 MPH wind speed! :) That moniker might not prove what you are hoping. It could have the most total fatalities because there are fewer options for the large population living close enough to make it a destination. Or if the measure is fatalities per attempt, maybe it just gets attempted by more unprepared people?

It's because there's more climbing gyms in the northeast.

Maybe aliens? Could be haunted?

Jake Jones wrote:Full on 5.11c opposing double gaston of 5.9 hand crack.

This is how I climbed Reppy's Crack... no joke. My partner mocked me quite a bit for that. I would like to think I would do it better if I went now, but I also don't want to fool myself.

~ Gabe

Not sure if this was already covered but...having a full set of hexes (aka cow bells).

Gets really grinchy about all this "nice weather" in December, after buying new ice tools in November! ...GRRR!

"This would be a classic if it were longer"

truly.... this is the essential east coast phrase

Alissa Doherty wrote:Funny stuff! * You've had a chigger bite (and you’ll never forget the experience). * Switchbacks annoy you. * You tread cautiously when mountain goats stalk you out West, but casually disregard black bears at home. * You’ve “tried” aid climbing and own the gear but haven’t found it to be rewarding. Not even a little. * Calling someone “crusty” is a compliment. * You regard any 5.11 roof out West to be Gunks 5.8.

Amen!!! lol
After living and climbing in the East all my life these are spot on!
lets not forget:

The duct tape on the belay jacket and gaiters
When someone from out of state asks what would be a recommended climb for a beginner leader we flash the "deer in the headlights" stare
leaper hangers are our friends
"why back that rusty piton up...you can't fall here anyway"
Hexes over cams and the musical clangings in the pitch pines
Midnight covert operations to remove bolts...from just about anywhere!
20F and its still hard finding a rock route open
And Mount Washington in January will kick your ass!!!!

Takes a ton of pictures of people climbing on TR

More cow bells!