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Ethics of Manufacturing a Route

Original Post
Skat B · · Down Rodeo · Joined Jan 2012 · Points: 1,075

In a canyon there is an overhanging pristine slab that is hidden from view of all climbers, hikers, and it's not even visible on Google Earth. It is not near any trails nor any climbing areas. Trees also obstruct its view from everything and everyone.

Like I said earlier this slab is very overhung and has no holds on it. It will never be climbed. It's impossible.

This would be a perfect face for a finger crack.

Materials Needed:

- Concrete saw with a generater
- Pre-euthanized dogs from an animal shelter to haul up the saw and the generator
- An axe to cut down the trees that are touching the slab
- ? Gallons of gasoline to fuel the generator
- 24-V Rotary hammer drill (for the anchors)

(1) What am I missing? The crack would be 50 feet long and several inches deep. How much gasoline and saw blades would I need? The rock is granite.

(2) Is this ethical? Keep in mind no one can see it, not even the satellites employed by Google Earth can see it.

nick manning · · superior,az · Joined Jan 2013 · Points: 0

you already broke rule #1

Glenn Schuler · · Monument, Co. · Joined Jun 2006 · Points: 1,330
Skat B wrote:(1) What am I missing?
A brain cell? Just build a crack machine in your yard.
michaeltarne · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Jan 2011 · Points: 120

I'm confused on the whole overhung slab thing.

michael rowell · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Apr 2011 · Points: 20
michaeltarne wrote:I'm confused on the whole overhung slab thing.
you haven't heard of overhung slab?? it's all the hype these days........
frankstoneline · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Apr 2009 · Points: 30
michael rowell wrote: you haven't heard of overhung slab?? it's all the hype these days........
No lie, one time a dude at the gym told me that anything less than 10* overhung was "basically considered a slab now"
Marc H · · Longmont, CO · Joined May 2007 · Points: 265

If it's not visible on Google Earth, it doesn't actually exist. I say do what you will with the rock.

Just don't fuck with any "pre-euthanized dogs" or I will hunt you down and inhumanely euthanize you.

Devin Fin · · DURANGO · Joined Jan 2010 · Points: 3,725

skat! will it be bolted! roof crack slab cut with a saw that cant be seen from outer space... what?

Tim Stich · · Colorado Springs, Colorado · Joined Jan 2001 · Points: 1,520

Pffft. Just use dynamite like they did on Sphinx Crack in the Splatte.

Skat B · · Down Rodeo · Joined Jan 2012 · Points: 1,075

It's an overhung cliff that is pretty smooth with no face holds or anything. You wouldn't even be able to aid this thing. And, yeah, this would be a trad climb. Definitely not a sport route!! The catch is that it is located on BLM land....

robrobrobrob · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Oct 2012 · Points: 10
rockclimbing.com/routes/Nor…

Granite would take longer, and I'm thinking the ethics might be different when it's not in a quarry.

On the plus side, it wouldn't get polished as quickly.

Who owns the land... maybe ask them.
Boissal . · · Small Lake, UT · Joined Aug 2006 · Points: 1,541
Skat B wrote:euthanized
I don't think this word means what you think it means.
That being said, anyone willing to take a saw to some choss should be encouraged to wear a GoPro and start a blog.
J. Albers · · Colorado · Joined Jul 2008 · Points: 1,926
Boissal wrote: I don't think this word means what you think it means. That being said, anyone willing to take a saw to some choss should be encouraged to wear a GoPro and start a blog.
Zing.

I have to admit, the responses have been pretty tame so far. Perhaps because this is such an obvious troll (or maybe its not, in which case "wow"). Either way, c'mon interweb trollers, its Friday and this is red meat....dig in and give the rest of us something to laugh about.
Superclimber · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Mar 2009 · Points: 1,310
Boissal wrote: I don't think this word means what you think it means.
"Inconceivable!"
Ken Noyce · · Layton, UT · Joined Aug 2010 · Points: 2,648
Skat B wrote:In a canyon there is an overhanging pristine slab that is hidden from view of all climbers, hikers, and it's not even visible on Google Earth. It is not near any trails nor any climbing areas. Trees also obstruct its view from everything and everyone. Like I said earlier this slab is very overhung and has no holds on it. It will never be climbed. It's impossible. This would be a perfect face for a finger crack. Materials Needed: - Concrete saw with a generater - Pre-euthanized dogs from an animal shelter to haul up the saw and the generator - An axe to cut down the trees that are touching the slab - ? Gallons of gasoline to fuel the generator - 24-V Rotary hammer drill (for the anchors) (1) What am I missing? The crack would be 50 feet long and several inches deep. How much gasoline and saw blades would I need? The rock is granite. (2) Is this ethical? Keep in mind no one can see it, not even the satellites employed by Google Earth can see it.
dude, that sounds sick!!! Let me know if you need any help hauling the saw or generator in.

P.S. I can bring the bosch, mine's 52 volts so it'll drill faster for when we put up the pocket routes.

P.P.S. you need to add some 5 gallon buckets of sika to your list for the glufa routes.
Superclimber · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Mar 2009 · Points: 1,310

If we feed this weak troll now, perhaps he will grow stronger and bolder. Then he will entertain us for many threads to come.

Superclimber · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Mar 2009 · Points: 1,310
Jake Jones wrote:I suck at thin tips cracks. Can you make two jagged runs up that fucker with the 'ole concrete saw then use a giant rail bar to pry/chisel the middle chunk out? #2 Camalot/#3 Helium is a great size for me. How about a crack at the FA too? Gas fumes give me migraines so no help hauling that up. However, you shouldn't need my help with hauling shit, you have the pre-killed dead dogs for that.
That's the spirit!!!
Josh B · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Feb 2010 · Points: 0

+1 for the GoPro video.

I am not going to debate the ethics but I think concrete saws are pretty heavy and hard to use, especially while hanging from a rope.

Crossing · · Breinigsville, PA · Joined Apr 2010 · Points: 1,621

You should cut horizontal cracks rather than vertical giving your area a more Gunks like feel, this way you get instant bragging rights about how sandbagged your route is and therefore how hard you crush.

Skat B · · Down Rodeo · Joined Jan 2012 · Points: 1,075

Forget the dogs, I'll haul it up there myself. No, I'm not a troll. Yes, this is a legitimate question!! I look down on manufactured routes usually but given the location and the face it would look A LOT better with a steep finger crack!! Yes, I have heard both sides argue over cutting a crack in a quarry (5.11- I think?)

Why a finger crack? Finger cracks are badass. I'd make it deep enough to place gear and full-on finger locks. It would resemble Cobra Crack and would be out of my league but just having it there would be pretty cool!

Horizontal cracks would be sick but would the route even be climbable ?? Oh, and due to limited funds it won't be a freakin' hand crack and I'm not cutting a nice line just to take a crowbar to it...

Btw..WTF is a crack machine?? I need schematics!!

Thanks!

matt davies · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Mar 2007 · Points: 25
Skat B wrote:In a canyon there is an overhanging pristine slab that is hidden from view of all climbers, hikers, and it's not even visible on Google Earth. It is not near any trails nor any climbing areas. Trees also obstruct its view from everything and everyone. Like I said earlier this slab is very overhung and has no holds on it. It will never be climbed. It's impossible. This would be a perfect face for a finger crack. Materials Needed: - Concrete saw with a generater - Pre-euthanized dogs from an animal shelter to haul up the saw and the generator - An axe to cut down the trees that are touching the slab - ? Gallons of gasoline to fuel the generator - 24-V Rotary hammer drill (for the anchors) (1) What am I missing? The crack would be 50 feet long and several inches deep. How much gasoline and saw blades would I need? The rock is granite. (2) Is this ethical? Keep in mind no one can see it, not even the satellites employed by Google Earth can see it.
I've had a little bit of experience in this arena. First off, forget dogs. Dogs, even pre-euthanized, are an ethical powder keg. Get yourself some half-starved horses, they come cheaper and when you are done with them you can butcher them for lasagna.
Second, your saw is going to get hotter than Archie Bunker at an Obama rally once you get going. Get together a bunch of war orphans, some malnourished, some with cleft-palates, to cry as profusely as they can muster.A fiend of mine says onions will work to get the little tykes going, but I had the best results showing hard-core bouldering films on a loop. You'll need about a gallon. Use their tears to keep your saw cool.
Other than that, sounds like you've got a well thought out and exciting proj!
Cheerio!
Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

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