Matt Wilder's Handlebar Mustache

So not that Im going to be that person that dogs on someones achievements but I just want to put it out there that we are blessed to be living in an area (Boulder) with such prestigious climbers. I am going to say that Im sort of tired of seeing these people out in public with their sponsored cloths and shiney gear, and in Matt Wilder's case a FAKE HANDLEBAR MUSTACHE, that was clearly a beard just a few days ago and was then carved into a Handlebar Stache, it makes me wonder as to what else Colorado's boy genius has carved out of a fabricated lifestyle, um maybe some of his so called v14 climbs perhaps? I dont know, maybe some of his so called 5.14d trad routes? Im just saying. I think his rubics cube in under 30 seconds is a sham as well.

Sooo....he DOESN'T climb 5.14 because he may or may not have a fake mustache??

hmmmm...well there's a "MP Roast" thread going on if you wanna get in on it.

That must make 2G the shit, then!

makes a mean cam and guitar; I do believe part of the climber's 10 essentials, or should be anyway

Yeah, I noticed the fake stache too. What. A. Poser.

Is it be any more or less embarassing when some "poser" warms up with an on-sight of your project than when someone with a REAL handlebar mustache does it?

umm, what was the point of this post?
oh yeah, the fake mustache!
who cares, if we were all the same life would suck!
he seems to be a bit wilder, and you a bit tamer. . .
did he do something to really piss you off?

So why is it a fake stache?
Because he cut off a beard and was left with a stache?

wow, ur right, what a total douche...

Handlebar mustaches that have been carved from beards are a TRUE sign that you are a poser. Wait. What? What else are you supposed to do when it's time to shave off your beard? You have to have fun with it, even if it's for a week.

Mark Cushman wrote:Handlebar mustaches that have been carved from beards are a TRUE sign that you are a poser. Wait. What? What else are you supposed to do when it's time to shave off your beard? You have to have fun with it, even if it's for a week.

The ladies are still crying about missing out on a ride.

I'm so confused... are you upset with shiny things? Sponsors? Mustaches? Matt Wilder?

I'm just want to be absoulety clear on this, because I have a new, shiny, sponsored mustache that I don't want to be hated for.

So not that Im going to be that person that dogs on someones achievements but I just want to put it out there that we are blessed to be living in an area (Boulder) with such prestigious climbers. I am going to say that Im sort of tired of seeing these ridiculous posts from jealous wilder critics on the web (MP.com) with their un sponsored cloths and old shitty gear, and in Aaron Furmans case a deep longing to climb hard trad once he graduates from wrestling pebbles. It clearly stems from deep insecurities about insecure gear and sacking up, oh and Im tired of ironic hipster staches, I might shave mine off today, wait. maybe not, someone will surely post my mug on the internet to make fun of my bald face... shit.

I dont understand how one does not see the correlation between strutting around climbing areas with a fake visual such as a non-regulation "handlebar" mustache and the integrity of that same person's climbing abilities. I mean if hes willing to fake the stache then it seems to me he may fake a rubics cube scam on the street in order to be put in a movie such as CORE; thats all im saying. Think about it. Just because its a rubics "cube" it doesnt mean that you have to think inside of it, free your mind and think outside of the parameters of your own box is all that Im saying.

what i really want to know is why did you change your login name from aaron furman to blkjesus? so, what i think i'm gathering from all this, correct me if i'm wrong, is this:

you picked up on matt wilder at the bar, he turned you down, you tried again, and his girlfriend punched your lights out?

How do you think the Mountain and Southern sun do "chops" week? It's not like everyone that participates grew straight up chops...beard>goatee or chops>mustache>clean shaven

Repeat every fall.

slim wrote:what i really want to know is why did you change your login name from aaron furman to blkjesus? so, what i think i'm gathering from all this, correct me if i'm wrong, is this: you picked up on matt wilder at the bar, he turned you down, you tried again, and his girlfriend punched your lights out?

lmao

is all this bc aaron cannot grow facial hair?

Bob Robinson wrote:I'm so confused... are you upset with shiny things? Sponsors? Mustaches? Matt Wilder? I'm just want to be absoulety clear on this, because I have a new, shiny, sponsored mustache that I don't want to be hated for.

pffffft. POSER!

It either is or it isn't and this isn't. And who's Matt Wilder?

Mark Nelson wrote:That must make 2G the shit, then! makes a mean cam and guitar; I do believe part of the climber's 10 essentials, or should be anyway

I've had mine since ~1993.
Everyone can tell that I care deeply about being in style.
:^}>

Gregger Man wrote: I've had mine since ~1993. Everyone can tell that I care deeply about being in style. :^}>

And this is.

WiledHorse wrote: lmao is all this bc aaron cannot grow facial hair?

Aaron can grow mean ass facial hair, its nothing but upper lip magic all the way down to my ball fro.

CalmAdrenaline wrote:So not that Im going to be that person that dogs on someones achievements but I just want to put it out there that we are blessed to be living in an area (Boulder) with such prestigious climbers. I am going to say that Im sort of tired of seeing these ridiculous posts from jealous wilder critics on the web (MP.com) with their un sponsored cloths and old shitty gear, and in Aaron Furmans case a deep longing to climb hard trad once he graduates from wrestling pebbles. It clearly stems from deep insecurities about insecure gear and sacking up, oh and Im tired of ironic hipster staches, I might shave mine off today, wait. maybe not, someone will surely post my mug on the internet to make fun of my bald face... shit.

Is it just me -- I have absolutely no idea what this all means.

A good day, normally un-sponsored in the corporate-cents, is listening to the 2G (or C2, depending) and in the intricacies of fine machining, brewing beer, dogs & cats living together, and why the world is in such a pickle. But dang if that ain't the f'n coolest stash you'll ever see.