PRINT: Climb Zombie Armageddon (a.k.a. Dan's Penis), Central Coast

Zombie Armageddon (a.k.a. Dan's Penis)

V10, Boulder, 30 ft (9 m),

Avg: 2.3 from 3 votes
FA: I recently found out that some dude named Pat, hailing from British Columbia, did it before Dan.
California > Central Coast > Santa Barbara > Santa Barbara… > Brickyard > Dancing Outlaw Boulder

Description

The crucial hold for the crux has broken in the past few months. It is now a much worse and more painful crimp, but I've heard that the route still goes.
Essentially just an extension of Akiba's Prison, which is already a power endurance problem, Zombie adds a few moves that are harder than anything on Akiba's and it certainly requires another level of fitness.
The crux revolves around negotiating the very overhanging, almost blank face to the left of the Dancing Outlaw.

Location

Start sitting on the far left of the boulder, traverse right through I'm Not Broke, but I'm Badly Bent, and into Akiba's Prison.

Protection

A pad or two will do you just fine.

Photos [Hide ALL Photos]

Andy Patterson in the crux of Zombie Armageddon.

Andy Patterson in the crux of Zombie Armageddon.

A photo I dug up of Andy attempting the SB power endurance test piece Purgatory.

A photo I dug up of Andy attempting the SB power endurance test piece Purgatory.

Comments [Hide ALL Comments]

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

The problem definitely goes; I've done it several times since the holds broke. I don't think it is V10. I would say maybe V9, since after the crux (in the cave) you can cop a no-hands stem-rest and almost completely recover for the finish. Some might call that Jessery. Regardless, this line is long, sustained, and requires a kind of route-strength for success. To me, it feels like a hard 5.12 or easy 5.13.

It's really, really fun. Tread carefully on the jugs near the beginning of the problem. They WILL break one of these days. Aug 23, 2010

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

After a long hiatus from The Brickyard, I repeated this problem today. I worked it over three or four sessions then sent. Man, I had to give it. Even though the bulk of the problem languishes in the shade, the exit on Smooth Criminal absolutely BAKES in the afternoon sun. I still don't really know what I would grade it, but the moves certainly don't feel any easier than they did a year ago. Sep 28, 2011

Trevor V.
Santa Barbara, Ca

Hey Andy have you tried doing this but finishing on dancing outlaw? May 21, 2012

Bob Banks

Trevor, I recall that Bernd did that as the original traverse line from the left (meaning a couple years before it got linked into Akiba/Smooth Criminal). I remember him calling it Purgatory (V10), but I could be wrong. May 21, 2012

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

Bernd has done it. He calls it V9/V10. It's for sure harder than Z-Armaggedon. I tried it a few sessions ago, and slipped off the hot, slimy slopers. I think it's a pretty rad line since it has no reststotal power-endurance. May 21, 2012

Trevor V.
Santa Barbara, Ca

Yeah, I was up there today thinking it would be really cool. Going to work on it later this week. Thanks for the info guys. May 22, 2012

Tim King

There's a vid floating around of that fella, he traverses from the left into Dancing outlaw, but once on the slope finishes straight up.. Cool!

Ah, there it is: Purgatory (V9+) @ 2min 50 sec
youtube.com/watch?v=8lecEdm…

Makes it look easy... May 27, 2012

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

Just found a silly iPhone video of me climbing ZA. The inimitable Ian Walters filming.

youtube.com/watch?v=7Ojdhxv… Feb 20, 2013

Bob Banks

Looks like a video of you not climbing it to me. [/rimshot] Feb 22, 2013

Alex Rich
Santa Barbara, California

It looks like the jugs at the beginning absolutely blew off the wall. When I went up there last, there were chunks of rock scattered everywhere around where they used to be. I didn't try that section to see if there's still a way to start as far left as you can on the boulder, but I may just start to the right of the (now broken) jugs on that side-pull crimp thing where Bernd originally started Purgatory. Mar 10, 2015

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

Ah well. It's a chossy boulder to begin with. I'm optimistic you can start from the far left sitit'll just be that much more demanding. I haven't been up there in ages, but my guess the holds on that rig have gotten much more weathered and plastered with chalk and hand-smarm. I guarantee more holds will break, too... Mar 11, 2015

Alex Rich
Santa Barbara, California

I'll let you know if the far left start still works next time I go up there, might be a couple weeks though. If so maybe it'll be solid v10. Mar 12, 2015

Ar Turd

as of two weeks ago, the broken hold doesn't change anything. The moves far left are still much easier than the rest. Apr 3, 2015

andy patterson
Carpinteria, CA

V9

I second that: the new breakage makes the opening moves harder, but doesn't up the overall difficulty too much. It does, however, make this awesome line even more awesomer [sic]! The old sequence used a huge flexing jug; now it passes through series of nice, medium-sized flat edges. I went up to ZA after a long hiatus from the Brickyard (read: it's been years), and had loads of fun. The "new" start makes this problem MUCH better, in my opinion. Jul 4, 2015

Sean Crozier
Oxnard, CA

Is it cheating if you cop a (no-hands-ass-out-head-between-your-legs-stemming- rest) in the cave before finishing it? That's my beta. Sep 30, 2015

Pablo Hammack

V10

Felt like a soft 10 to me. More sustained and pumpy then "Way of the Samurai". Sep 4, 2016