Type: Sport, 110 ft
FA: Tod Anderson, Mark Felty, Rich Magill
Page Views: 2,217 total · 11/month
Shared By: Tod Anderson on Aug 19, 2002
Admins: Leo Paik, John McNamee, Frances Fierst, Monty, Monomaniac

You & This Route

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Access Issue: Seasonal Closure - 2018 Update Details


Boulder is full of em'.... Anyway, another Easter Rock left side route, the furthest left route as of 8/20/02. The big roof is the crux, with a difficult start to the roof. Once you get past the crux move enjoy the amazing rail, stop do some pull ups, wave to people down below, or whatever. The pointed hold just before the slot in the crack could break if someone pulled on the tip of it. I used the scooped area of it as a gaston which made the most sense to me and negates the need to use any glue. I left two cold shuts below the roof in the confusing web of bolts that allow the first part to be done as a warm up at about 10+ or 11a. I'll do a little bit more cleaning on the bottom of the route soon. IMPORTANT - a 60m rope may not reach if you belay on the trail - it's easy to scramble up to the first bolt & belay there if you need to.


11 bolts plus the anchor.


- No Photos -
Can someone explain what is up with these stupid route names? Boulder Canyon is full of them, with such gems as Ice Hose Chopper Lynch Mob or the eloquent Fuck You. Why bother with bolting and climbing a route if the name of it is just another rant? Tod, I, anonymous coward, challenge you to rename this climb something that people won't roll their eyes at 20 years from now. Aug 26, 2002
I thought the whole point of naming a route was to include your particular rant which people will roll their eyes 20 at years from now. What would you prefer, "Unknown #5"? Aug 26, 2002
Tod Anderson
Tod Anderson  
Reaction.... good, it means people are thinking. The whole point of a couple of these route names is to take a shot at Boulder, and the sometimes pretentious hypocritical inhabitants. I doubt that will change in 20 years. It seems to me that there are plenty of the route's namesakes sitting in their coffee houses in Boulder drinking coffee grown in denuded rainforests, warmed with power generated by fossil fuels, bemoaning the horrible impacts that thrill-seeking climbers cause who want to close every crag around Boulder. Hopefully the miscellaneous open space departments won't get a hold of any more climbing areas. Aug 26, 2002
I doubt route names like this are going to help with land managers. Aug 26, 2002
Charles Vernon
mind & body in Colorado, he…
Charles Vernon   mind & body in Colorado, he…
What about routes like "Smack That Bitch Up" in Clear Creek? That should help with land manangers, and with attracting more women to the sport (and this site). Aug 26, 2002
I didn't realize women ever looked at this site, let alone contributed. Spraying about routes, spraying about mighty first ascents, making bold political statements such as oh-so rugged individualists like Mr. Anderson make with their trivial route names, and limp ego-stroking all seem to be the sordid and exclusive domain of men. Or should I say, boys. Aug 27, 2002
Just for the record, although Tod gave me FA credit, I had nothing to do with naming or drilling this route (or "Smack That Bitch Up", for that matter). I am environmentally friendly, and I have never smacked any bitches up.

However, since Tod bought the bolts, and spotted the line, and did the drilling, and sent the route, I think he can name it whatever he wants to name it. I don't see why this name is any worse or better than "Skull Fuck" or "Magical Chrome Plated Semi-automatic Enema". We can't call every route "The Naked Edge".

Seriously, if you don't like the name, go put up your own routes, and name them anything you like. Aug 27, 2002
We can't call every route the Naked Edge but we can try a little harder to make route names less lame. I don't know if it's the rant-factor or the wordiness or the lack of humor or all three but this name blows

Hypothetical Conversation:

Adoring Dad: So junior, what route did you do today?Junior: Well Dad I sent "Chickenshit Armchair Environmentalist" at Easter Rock! AD: Great send!


" Dude, I'm going to hang my draws on Chickenshit Armchair Environmentalist."

C'mon Tod, you know it's the right thing to do. Change the name or some CAE might get out of the armchair and take your route to junk hardware heaven. Aug 27, 2002
Richard M. Wright
Lakewood, CO
Richard M. Wright   Lakewood, CO
I am reminded by this discussion of the bruhaha that surrounded route names at The City of Rocks. So "offensive" were they that the self-righteous mothers in Boise tried (in vain) to shut down climbing at the City. Funny. Once the furor had dissipated, all that remained were good routes with their original names including Carol's Crack, Nipples and Clits, Crotchbound, Psycho Ranger and on and on. Times change, but the tune remains the same. Perhaps the self-righteous moaners might instead inquire of Tod what transpired to elicit this barb. Aug 27, 2002
I didn't say offensive, I said lame, stupid, wordy, and unfunny. This isn't a free speech issue, it's a non-stupid speech issue. Aug 28, 2002
There is not even one single comment about "Muff Diver" at Castlewood, what gives? Aug 29, 2002
Hey, what is with the add a bolt program. Two belay stations, come on. The route name is good for the texture of the rock and the way Boulder rocks do not clean well. My friends drink coffee there too, but I have no problem with the name at all. Tried the route and about tore my shoulder off. Sep 29, 2002
One star. Jun 22, 2003
The name of this route is too long and does't really flow, because of this the whole point of this argument is moot. The more likely course of events that will be pursued is that it will just be called "chickenshit", "armchair enviromentalists", or "Chickenshit Enviromentalists". Oct 20, 2003
Paul Hunnicutt
Boulder, CO
Paul Hunnicutt   Boulder, CO
What an awesome route name. And perfect for Boulder! IMHO. Jul 27, 2007
Ken Cangi
Eldorado Springs, CO
Ken Cangi   Eldorado Springs, CO
LMAO. Only in Boulder. Sep 7, 2007
Eric Carlos
Eric Carlos   depends
Love those "chickenshit armchairs". May 22, 2012
The tradition of first ascentionists naming their routes with innuendo or crass language goes back a long way. The Vulgarians in the Gunks, Chuck Pratt, Yvon Chouinard, the Stonemasters, even John Muir (!) and others are great examples of the long standing tradition of counterculteralism in climbing in America. This phenomenon isn't limited to Boulder Canyon. Hate to break it to you, AC, but this is the way it is. Maybe you can convince a group of Mormon Fundamentalists to make a PG rated playpen out your slice of reality, but as long as badasses keep coming up with badass names for badass routes... you're only trying to bail water out of an already sunken ship. We like it that way. Jun 18, 2017
Mark Rolofson
Mark Rolofson  
I gave this route one star in a 5 star system in "Boulder Canyon Sport & Adventure Climber's Guide - Volume II". I have been up the route, but I have not redpointed it. I have no intention of ever going back. This route is a good way to strain or injure your left shoulder on the crux. The crux is brief, then a few 5.11 jug moves finish. There is no anchor, unless you traverse right to Trustafarian Panhandler. Then someone must second it. Otherwise, you must downaid the roof, & thread your rope through two of the bolts that have coldshut hangers to descend.

The route belays on the trail. Thrash through vegetation to get to the rock. Take caution getting to the 1st bolt, there is a loose block.

The best climbing is in the middle of the pitch below the roof. The climbing is 5.9 & easier, even though one move may be harder. The rock is good, & there are some interesting, fun moves in this section of the route.

The route name is far better than the route. Jul 23, 2017