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“Breaking up” with sketchy climbing partners
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The guy I rope solo with is horrible...... but he just keeps showing up everytime I climb. |
Scott Biegert wrote: I know that guy. He sure gets around. |
Scott Biegert wrote: You should bang that guys wife, that'd teach him a lesson lol. |
Scott Biegert wrote: I prefer my partners SILENT. |
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The only time I had to do this was with a rando from here on skywalker in Squamish. The guy showed up with a pretty shiny quad rack, and claimed he’s been climbing for over 20 years. I lead the first pitch, and then the guy decides to aid the second 5.8 pitch? When I follow p2, halfway up he yells for me to stop. I’m just waiting in the crux crack, trying to figure out what the hold up is for at least 5 minutes, before he finally says I’m good to go. P3 goes no problem, p4, the skywalker pitch, he drops a cam that lands on a ledge below the climb. Finishes the pitch, belays me to within 10 feet of him, then takes me off belay? I solo the last little bit of the climb for some reason and then clove in. He then has me lower him 50m down to the cam, refuses any advice on how to make jugging up the rope easier, and just yanks himself up 3 inches on the rope, and makes me take in the slack. This took at least an hour and a half. Once we get to the top of the climb I call him out on everything again, and find out the p2 issue was him taking apart the belay on the anchor, and moving it to his harness, because he wasn’t comfortable? I cussed him out for a few minutes and let him figure out the trail down on his own. |
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I stopped climbing with someone who oversold their abilities and took me off belay without telling me earlier this summer. This person declared on MP partner finder they could lead up to 5.9 on gear. In reality, they could barely follow their way up a 5.8 hand crack. Lots of hang dogging on perfect 1’s and 2’s. This is the second time we’ve climbed together and first time we’re on an easy multi. Supposed to swing leads, but I end up leading everything. Whatever. Red flag number 1, but I let it slide. We begin our multi. First pitch has a thin section, so I look down to make sure I’m getting a good belay. They’re standing ten plus feet away from the wall with lots of slack out. I ask them to stand closer to provide an attentive belay in case I fall. I receive some combative attitude about how ‘it’s fine’, but they eventually move closer when I insist. Red flag 2. Pitch three. Easy 5.8. I set off on lead after doing safety checks. Things look good to go. I’m seven or eight feet above the anchor working to get my first piece in and I hear person exclaim, “oh s***, you’re on backwards”. Before I could respond, I see that they have me off belay entirely. This person apparently had oriented me for a right handed belay off their ATC. They're a lefty. Boom. Breakup material. I was livid. We finish the climb cordially, hike out and carpool home together. I let them know we won’t be climbing anymore and ask them why they think we’re done. They can’t give me a good answer. This is the cherry on top. I let them know exactly why and they get defensive again. Note: if they had just asked to take me off for a second, I would’ve said yes. Could’ve gone direct to a piece, moved to a better stance…anything. To me, failure to communicate critical information about your partners’ safety is a cardinal offense in this sport. I hope this person learned a lesson and keeps their partners on belay 100% of the time these days. However, I still see they’re overselling their rock ability on partner finder (unless they have seriously upped their game in the last couple months). I’ve informed a couple friends that use partner finder from time to time to avoid roping up with this person. |
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I climbed a few times with a guy who seemed great. Great climber good belayer etc but he whined a lot, not a big deal. Then he complained that he felt a bit of tension in the rope when making a difficult second clip in a roof, and it was annoying him so i needed to give more slack. I was like, ok, but also it's a clip 4 meters above the ground, so forgive a little bite as it is sketchy. Just give more slack. Anyway, it did not go well. He pulled slack, dropped it and fell, we ended up suspended together about 2-3 feet over the ground. He said I was an idiot who had not understood him and didn't know how to belay and could have killed him. Then he said something really weird and racist about a group of foreign climbers who were trying the same route (blame blame blame for everyone except himself about his failure to do his project). I was very sorry, obviously it was me not able to execute this complicated belay, so I suppose in this instance it is me the sketchy one. But he was so emotionally and socially sketchy that I blocked him across platforms and I've refused to even make eye contact since. This might be a story with no heros? and just two unstable baddies? So be it. |
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There may be some of these sketchy partners lurking on this thread wondering, "Damn, are they talking about me!???" For those folks, and anyone new to multi-pitch, there is a previous thread started by rgold that is well worth review: How To Get Asked Out On a Second Date Even more experienced climbers could get something out of the many suggestions found therein. |
Daniel Joder wrote: If somebody has the capacity to self-inquire, they are likely not the sketchy ones. :) And this does not just apply to climbing. |
Mnt File wrote: I blew the second clip on a climbing first date in college (literally just remembering this). Landed right on my partner and didn't get a second date. She made the right call I think hahaha. |
Jonathan Walker wrote: This is where my head is at now. If you are able to accept feedback from others and are looking to improve, you won't stay sketchy for long. |
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Have I told this one before? I met up with a young guy at a Safeway parking lot in Tucson where climbers used to do that. After I did the roof on the second pitch of a two pitch crack route which was the 5.10 crux of the route, I realized that with the wind and the distance to the anchors that I should have spent more time explaining what I would do and what he should do if we couldn't hear each other (my bad), so I down climbed through the roof so that I could see him and communicate clearly. With my hand in the essential jam to pull back up through the roof I looked down and saw him on the ledge smoking, with neither hand on the rope, (he was belaying with an ATC – this was pre gri-gri) and all the slack I had generated from down climbing piled up in front of him. I was climbing well at that level at the time, but no where near solid enough to free solo it. I told him to put out the cig, put me back on a real belay, and told him not to take me off or start climbing until I had pulled the rope tight on him. I got him to the anchor, marched us back to my car and drove him back down the mountain without speaking another word to him. It was one of the few times I have been really angry at someone. Also angry at myself for having started up that route with someone I knew nothing about without taking more time to assess his competence. I had watched him belay me on the first pitch and he seemed to know how to belay, but I was making assumptions about many things. |
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Two partners I broke up with were both because of their driving habits. One would steer with his knees and floss his teeth while he was driving on back roads. And the other would be scrolling mountain project, looking for routes to climb. |
june m wrote: We hygienic big beta daddies don’t want to climb with you either! |
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I once had one of these partners... I used to love climbing with the guy when I first started outdoors, but then for about 3 months, he got into motorcycles and didn't climb. Anyway, he eventually decides he wants to get back into it, he texts me and we go out to the Utah Wall. As we're walking up, I ask him if he's still good to belay (and rappel, this is important later), and he confirms, saying that it is "something you just don't forget man". Eventually, we get up to the wall, I rack up and tie in, and set off on a very easy route called Shotgun. Right as I'm about to hit the roof, I look down to check that everything is still ok and I see a pile of slack on the ground. I don't mean he had a belly of slack that was touching the ground, I mean he had a full on pile. At least 3 shoulder coils. I was pretty terrified, as I wasn't expecting to solo this pitch, and talked to him from about halfway up the pitch about how much slack to have in the system when belaying. The rest of the pitch goes fine, no biggie, and I get lowered so he can give it a shot. While I was putting my rack back in my bag, grabbing water, and taking my shoes off, this guy was glued to his phone. it got to the point to where I had everything ready, grigri on my end, and he hadn't tied in or put his shoes on. Whatever, he must have someone important he's talking to. Eventually, he climbs the pitch, comes back down, and proceeds to ask me to wait for a solid 25 minutes so he can go film his motorcycle buddies from the crag. Again, I brush it off, and we go back to climbing after he takes his video. I then end up trying the variation of the route we did before, and he proceeds to pull me up on top rope. This infuriates me, but I brush it off and try to be understanding. Anyway, the night comes to a close, and we end up going to rappel out of the crag to the road. I put the rope through, tie back up knots, and tell him to get on it. He proceeds to completely fuck up his setup and clips the wire of the atc instead of the rope. insane. I tell him to sit back (he still had his PA in) and he has the oh shit moment before his pa catches him where his rope slips out of his atc. I end up having to lower him, in the dark, because he didn't know how to rappel. Apparently he had a great time, and had to learn to "deal with the fear of it all". I was not happy, to say the least. When we got to the car I asked him why he lied to me about being able to belay and rappel, he blames me for not taking him out enough, and not teaching him how to rappel enough times. I think his ego was too big to admit that he didn't know how to do the things he could do before, and decided to use me as the guinea pig for his shenanigans. Realizing that was very frustrating. I went out with him two more times, which I'm far too lazy to describe in full detail, but the first time, he basically made me downclimb half a pitch because he said it looked too hard for him while he was belaying on the ground. The pitch was 5.7. The second time he short-roped me for every single bolt of an overhung route. I got pretty pumped but didn't fall. When I got down, I asked him why he shortroped me and he blamed it on the bolts having bad rope drag. While clipping, I could hear the grigri clicking... Anyway he hang dogged the entire pitch while top roping it, and ended up needing to jug up the final moves. I haven't told him I'll never climb with him again, as I have lots of classes with him, but I'll never go climbing with him again. Sorry for the novel!! |
