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The East Quarry
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Hellhound (originally submitted as Viagra Crack) 

YDS: 5.12 French: 7b+ Ewbanks: 27 UIAA: VIII+ ZA: 26 British: E6 6b A0 R

   
Type:  Trad, Aid, 1 pitch, 50'
Original:  YDS: 5.12 French: 7b+ Ewbanks: 27 UIAA: VIII+ ZA: 26 British: E6 6b A0 R [details]
FA: John Langston
Season: Fall/Winter/Spring
Page Views: 1,856
Submitted By: Orphaned on Mar 22, 2009

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Description 

This looks like it might be a good trad route. Closer inspection reveals lots of extra bolts. If you are a limp old man, looking to get up, this is the route for you.

Per Mark Rolofson: John Langston attempted to establish the route on lead drilling 2 bolts on aid. Then below the next to last bolt on Pretzel Logic, he fell pulling pro from breaking rock. To finish, he swung over to Pretzel Logic & finished up that line. He returned to clean, inspect pro, & top rope the route. He removed one of his own bolts & did not clip the bolts on Pretzel Logic (the first 2 & the last 2) on his headpoint ascent. He later removed the bolts on Pretzel Logic that he skipped, moving the 2nd bolt left & creating a new finish named Defective Agency. I later returned to replace the first bolt & the last 2 bolts on Pretzel Logic. It was there first. Even with these bolts, this route is still serious & should not be underestimated. I would NOT bring just stoppers. A few Aliens seem necessary, especially a red past the crux bolt with #5-6 micro stopper to protect hard moves to reach the next to last bolt on PL.

Location 

It's obvious. This is a crack line that looks easier than it is with a bolt in the middle. The bolts at the bottom and top were added as a remedy for old men with ED (EverygoddamnedpieceofrockIseeismine Dysfunction).

Protection 

Floppy quickdraws and a flacid nut or two.

Per Kirk Miller: the bolts at the top and the bottom were placed before Viagra Crack was cleaned or climbed. All but one were removed when this route was climbed, then they were replaced since they were part of its neighbor, Pretzel Logic.

Per Mark Rolofson: bolt, Aliens, & microstoppers.


Comments on Hellhound (originally submitted as Viagra Crack) Add Comment
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By mlloyd
From: denver
Oct 3, 2012

I led this route about a week ago. It's a very nice, heady, trad climb with a bolt or two (just when you need them). It sits in the 5.12c range. I found it quite challenging. I recommend this route if you like Eldo. The gear is tricky, and the climbing is thoughtful yet powerful.
By Mark Rolofson
Jan 16, 2016

The original name of the route was "Hellhound" & rated .12c. Calling it the Viagra Crack & rating it A0 is ridiculous. The history of the first ascent by John Langston, goes as follows (some of it I personally witnessed): first, John attempted to establish the route on lead drilling 2 bolts on aid. Then below the next to last bolt on Pretzel Logic, he fell pulling pro from breaking rock. To finish he swung over to Pretzel Logic & finished up that line. He returned to clean, inspect pro & top rope the route. He removed one of his own bolts & did not clip the bolts on Pretzel Logic (the first 2 & the last 2) on his headpoint ascent. He later removed the bolts on Pretzel Logic that he skipped, moving the 2nd bolt left & creating a new finish named Defective Agency. I later returned to replace the first bolt & the last 2 bolts on Pretzel Logic. It was there first. Even with these bolts, this route is still serious & should not be underestimated. I would NOT bring just stoppers. A few Aliens seem necessary, especially a red past the crux bolt with #5-6 micro stopper to protect hard moves to reach the next to last bolt on PL.
By highaltitudeflatulentexpulsion
From: Colorado
Jan 31, 2016

I've seen this falsehood before. It pisses me off, not because I care about the route anymore but because what you're spreading is untrue. I give you benefit of doubt that you don't remember correctly, but I bet you're just lying.

Before I start, Mark, you have my permission to add any bolt you want to this route, or chop them, or my personal favorite, dynamite the entire cliff band.

So a younger, stronger, more purist me found this line. In fairness, Kirk was there that same day. He was establishing what would become Pretzl Logic. It seemed odd, since it didn't follow the plumb (Hellhound is the plumb), but it wandered around to make it harder than the obvious line (Defective Agency is the obvious line). It's this weird inbetweener that isn't the plumb, isn't the easy line, and isn't the hard line.

Anyway, Kirk bolted Pretzl Logic first, like half an hour before I tried Hellhound, after I'd asked him to wait. Once I actually got on Hellhound, I was able to get multiple solid cams through the start. It was unfortunate, because you could easily reach Pretzl's bolts from there. I climbed a little higher, and it was blank. This is where a rock broke, making the route easy enough for me to climb. I nested half a ballnut and two lobes of something small and tagged up Kirk's drill. This is where I added one bolt. The one that is still there. I never added a second. After that bolt, I got multiple double Alien placements. Yes, I did clip more bolts from Pretzl (since it had once again wandered over to the plumb line) to check it out. When I did this, I immediately found bomber yellow and red Alien placements on the under side of the ear.

Kirk and I left that day neither sending anything, but there were 4 big, shiny bolts near really good placements. Within a few days, I came back and sent Hellhound (12c) belayed by Ken Trout, I only clipped the one bolt I added. That day I asked Kirk to remove those 4 bolts. He (I shit you not) actually said that maybe he should. I figured he'd do it, since it was a weird line and was unsent. A week or two or three later, he recruited stronger hands to send the route for him. A while after that and seeing a bunch of photos of the route on MP, I knew it was there to stay.

This pissed me off for two reasons. 1. Regardless of timing, it was a bad line. 2. I sent the proper line first, and the bolts there were tainting it. I had an injury that limited me to 9 functional fingers, so I hiked up there with a drill, bag of bolts, and a crowbar. I removed those 4 bolts. The two low and the two high that were basically directly on Hellhound.

I climbed around there, explored the top, and found that the direct line was A. easier (11a), B. didn't interfere, and C. was a ton of fun. So I bolted it. Tracy Roach showed up after work and belayed me on it. What I added was 3 bolts, and we had a stand alone (other than the anchor) line that was totally worth doing. It's not like Pretzl Logic ever disappeared either, but you'd need a handful of Aliens to finish. I never figured it would turn into an 8 year pissing match.

TLDR
Dumb wandering line got chopped in favor of 2 fun direct routes. I never added a bolt that I chopped.

If I had it to do again, I would have walked away. I wouldn't have climbed that route or any in the Easy Quarry. Much like many past relationships, it seemed OK at the time but isn't worth the drama in the long run.
By Mark Rolofson
Feb 11, 2016

John, the only falsehood here is the A0 rating & gear recommendation for a few flaccid nuts. For years I have avoided commenting on this route posting, to avoid exactly the sort response that you wrote. However, I felt this description (by Orphaned) of the route, does a huge public disservice. Anyone unaware of the route's history, that doesn't understand the disgruntled sarcasm, could be misinformed. It is not an aid climb! Climb it with 1 bolt, all 4 bolts, or lead it with no bolts, it is still a free climb. To my knowledge it has never been done as an aid climb, but it certainly would not be A0. A2 would probably be more accurate. First, some of the placements may be in questionable rock. Secondly, getting to the next to last bolt could prove difficult, since the crack peters out.

As far as me "just lying", I would very careful calling me a liar. I've been a lot of ugly things at times but a liar has never been one of them. As far as me misremembering, I am not just relying on my recent memory of your ascent in January 2009. I documented the first ascent info in "Golden Rock Climbs" (published September 2010). So, I actually recorded this info on my computer files in Winter 2009.

Perhaps I have always misremembered about you drilling 2 bolts. I could swear I have seen a patched hole the many times I have top-roped this route. Yes, I have not led this route. I have carefully inspected the gear with the intention of leading it. I can tell you that I would not consider leading it without the next to last bolt it shares with "Pretzel Logic". You can't place good gear here, if you can even get a poor piece. You'd be running it out on insecure moves with a micro stopper several feet below your feet & an Alien in a shallow, parallel slot below that. Once you get to the roof, the only gear goes in the same slot your fingers go in. Good placement if placed right. Sure helps to know exactly what to place & where, because your survival depends on it. Personally, I'm happy not to have to place it in my handhold & clip the last bolt instead.

I can agree with much of your recollection of the first ascent. Perhaps you forgot, that Kirk's drill didn't have enough charge to finish a hole, so I let you use mine. When you fell, the breaking rock hit Mike Cichon in the head. Luckily he was okay.

What it is really different is your account is how your attempt to establish "Hellhound" ground up ended. It ended with a leader fall with pro pulling from breaking rock. This left your leg cut & bleeding plus Mike getting hit in the head. I distinctly remember that in order to finish you pendulumed over to holds below the 6th bolt of "Pretzel Logic" & climbed up from there using its upper 3 bolts (1 not on HH) to get to the anchor to retrieve your gear. This left the section of Hellhound below the roof unclimbed until you returned for your successful ascent. I remember that you decided the route needed to be cleaned on rappel. This day is what I witnessed, & I have remembered it like it was yesterday. I don't remember you inspecting the gear at the roof from the last bolt, but it doesn't matter. Whether you inspected this gear on rappel, lower-off or hanging from a bolt on lead, it's the same.

I was not present the day you sent the route. My understanding from information I received in 2009 (possibly from you) was that further cleaning, gear inspection, & top-roping of the route was done prior to your successful ascent. If this is not entirely the case, I stand corrected & my information is not absolutely correct. I could easily see how I could be wrong about you top-roping it. Call it a more of redpoint & less of a headpoint, if it makes you happy. It does seems like your memory is rather foggy on some of details. Regardless, it was a brilliant accomplishment to have led Hellhound with only one bolt. That said, it didn't give you the right to remove Kirk's bolts on Pretzel Logic.

Kirk was gracious enough to belay you. You were very arrogant & self serving to remove his bolts. Did you ever consider he wasn't the only one who enjoyed climbing "Pretzel Logic"? Without the first bolt, even climbing "Defective Agency" required a high stick clip or relying on one Alien placement to keep a climber from hitting the ground. I have climbed both finishes (DA & PL). They are both great. Pretzel Logic offers a good forearm pump. It was originally .11c, but a hold breaking past the 6th bolt makes it feel like almost .11d. Hellhound sees few ascents. I have NO intention of adding more bolts to it. It's good the way it is now. It's a challenging 5.12c trad (mixed gear & bolts) line up a classic dihedral. Serious, but not an X rated horror show.

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