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Apr 20, 2008
Starting the fourth class downclimb.  Photo by Ted...
Mark Nelson wrote:
Magical Chrome Plated Semi-Automatic Enema Syringe


If you can believe it, this one is just referred to as "The Syringe" in the newest guidebook.

Another good one:
Make That Move or It's the Six Foot Groove at the 'Gunks I think.
Peter Spindloe
From North Vancouver, BC
Joined Jan 15, 2001
3,554 points
Apr 20, 2008
MIND OVER SPLATTER is on of my favorite route names Stevie Nacho
From Utah
Joined Feb 21, 2008
602 points
Apr 20, 2008
Tasting @ New Belgium Brewing
A few that come to mind either because I've been on them, or (mostly) because their names really are that memorable from the guidebook:

The Crotchrobber
(Think hard, thin moves while stepping around a sharp arete)

Fat Girls on Mopeds

Mouse Tracks

Fontainebleau Me

Fistula

Four Shower Tokens, a Guinness, and My Girl

Bill and Tee's Excellent Adventure
(After Bill and Tee's convenience store outside of Jackson Falls, Il)

And of course there's always the Sex Wall at Devil's Lake, with Foreplay, Orgasm, Orgasm Direct, Resolution, and Second Coming.
Jay F. Weekly
Joined Jun 13, 2007
12 points
Apr 20, 2008
Sabino Canyon and the city of Tucson from atop the...
"Feels Like Someone Else" ...funny because the route is one of several on "Left Hand Wall," Hairpin, Mt. Lemmon, AZ. tbrain
Joined Jan 25, 2008
102 points
Apr 21, 2008
napping with the dog, the best damn dog on earth.
binge and purge-> next to incredible hand crack, UT winston
From Boulder, CO
Joined Mar 6, 2006
56 points
Apr 21, 2008
Got Milk? How about forearm pump? Tony leads "...
nobody wrote:
"At Your Cervix" is my favorite. it's a fingercrack, heh.


What do you think 'Fuzzy Undercling' refers to?
Tony B
From Around Boulder, CO
Joined Jan 1, 2001
23,503 points
Administrator
Apr 21, 2008
Starting the second section of Live to climb anoth...
Foster Falls: Darkie The Bumbeast Brad "Stonyman" Killough
From Alabama
Joined Jan 18, 2008
5,967 points
Apr 21, 2008
North Face - doesn't matter where -- the name itself just inspires all kinds of demoralizing confidence.

Childhood's End
Honky Ass Jam Crack
Return to Forever
Buff Johnson
Joined Dec 19, 2005
1,494 points
Administrator
Apr 21, 2008
Starting the second section of Live to climb anoth...
bradkillough wrote:
Foster Falls: Darkie The Bumbeast

Pallasades Park: Night Of The Climbing Dead
Brad "Stonyman" Killough
From Alabama
Joined Jan 18, 2008
5,967 points
Apr 21, 2008
Bandera
I can't remember where I read about it, but somewhere there is apparently a route named "Strunk and White."


Who are, of course, the authors of the classic grammar tome:

"The Elements of Style"


Anyone know where that climb is?
Chris Wenker
From Santa Fe
Joined Dec 21, 2007
2,002 points
Apr 21, 2008
Bouldering at right side of Sun Deck
Personally, I like names that are "plays" on other famous route names, like Grand Giraffe. YDPL8S
From Santa Monica, Ca.
Joined Aug 7, 2003
932 points
Administrator
Apr 21, 2008
Andrew Gram
My favorite route name of all time is a big wall route in the Wind Rivers. The north face of Mt Hooker has a route called Shady Lady. Simple, subtle, and brilliant.

Some rapid names/features are great. Gotta love Dildo Rock on the Gauley - if you hit it, you are fucked!
Andrew Gram
From Salt Lake City, UT
Joined Jan 1, 2001
3,577 points
Apr 21, 2008
You wanna' look like this when ya get old!
Vomit Launch Deaun Schovajsa
Joined May 17, 2006
266 points
Apr 21, 2008
Got Milk? How about forearm pump? Tony leads "...
John Langston wrote:
When I got the FA of the crack of the south R&J (gym crack!! Sweet, tell the mags!!!) they said I should name it. I wanted it to be called either "Fingerprints on Uranus" or "Hands on my nutsack". Not because it's a good name, but because kids climb there. Totally immature.


"Handstack my Nutsack"

...has a far nicer ring to it and I think that name NEEDS to be used on a FA of an offwidth soon!

"Handcrack my Haas" (Handcrack my Ass!) has already been taken...

-T.
Tony B
From Around Boulder, CO
Joined Jan 1, 2001
23,503 points
Apr 21, 2008
Skiing around.
I've always been partial to the ones that are like

The Smith/Jones Northwest Arete of the South Butress of Big Rock Formation.

I think even sport routes need names like these.
Darren in Vegas
From Las Vegas, NV
Joined Feb 13, 2006
2,147 points
Apr 21, 2008
Climber Drawing
Fester does Pugsley
It's a Nor'easter Outta Thar Sou'west
Crimson Cringe
Festering Puss Nodule
Tom Hanson
Joined Jan 1, 2001
1,125 points
Apr 21, 2008
I get excited over a large desert rack
finger lockin good - T-wall

In search of suds on washer woman tower. perfect name

conans gonads - lumpy
rob rebel
From Denver, co
Joined Jan 20, 2006
35 points
Apr 21, 2008
Arctic Rage & Dance of the Woo-Li Masters Buff Johnson
Joined Dec 19, 2005
1,494 points
Apr 21, 2008
Dark of the Moon
Although after doing it during a full moon night I think "dark side of the moon" would be oh so much better...
Boissal
From Small Lake, UT
Joined Aug 21, 2006
1,668 points
Apr 21, 2008
You'll have to ask this guy Buff Johnson
Joined Dec 19, 2005
1,494 points
Apr 21, 2008
Storm's comin, we keep climbin.  Wasted all the go...
Other interesting monikers from the Front Range:

Hymen Trouble
Urine Trouble

The Desert:

Brian's Schlong
Size Do Matter
Fuck This Sucks
Mangina
Elimination

Ice/Mixed:

Naked, Greased-Up Iraqi Cheerleaders Wearing Masks
Designator
Secret Probation
Pillar of Pain
Alan Searcy
From Pine, Colorado
Joined May 20, 2003
433 points
Apr 21, 2008
Head Like a Hole
Adventure Kayak Trundiling at the River Wall. It sits about 100ft. over the river where all the boaters come thru. sean connors
Joined Jul 27, 2005
177 points
Apr 21, 2008
Head Like a Hole
Alan Searcy wrote:
The Desert: Brian's Schlong Ice/Mixed: Naked, Greased-Up Iraqi Cheerleaders Wearing Masks


I forgot about those routes! What an awesome gift to Brian for his b-day.
sean connors
Joined Jul 27, 2005
177 points
Apr 21, 2008
You wanna' look like this when ya get old!
Alan Searcy wrote:
Other interesting monikers from the Front Range: Hymen Trouble Urine Trouble


These are side by side cracks on Almost Asshole Rock. We (Dave Gottenborg and I) named them for their lower bodily funtionality and its relationship to the asshole. That and he was in trouble on his lead, quickly followed by me having trouble on mine right next to it.
Deaun Schovajsa
Joined May 17, 2006
266 points
Apr 21, 2008
Lots of clever sounding routes names I actually dislike because they don't have any connection to the route itself. A few that do:

More Monkey Than Funky
Edging Skills or Hospital Bills
Crash and Burn

I could go on, but let me refer you instead to the JTree guidebook. Lots of clever routes names there.
Fat Dad
From Los Angeles, CA
Joined Nov 9, 2007
137 points


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