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whats the funniest climbing anchor someone DIDN'T die on...

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By Jeffrey Bauer
From loveland
Jul 29, 2007

I was up by combat rock this weekend and got to the top of a climb to set up a top rope for a new climber. On the traditional tree/root system everyone uses for the spot there was a ratchet strap wrapped and tensioned on the hooks that someone obviously used and couldn't get off to take home to strap up their motorcycle. I had to laugh at how easily if was removed and how stupid people really are. So what say you mountain project people...any good redneck anchor horror stories to bring to light? (all epic stories of rapping of a wedged nalgene will be excused...)

By Sam Lightner, Jr.
Jul 29, 2007
The Shield

I once rapped off a moss-bollard... it was in Borneo.

By Avery Nelson
From Boulder, CO
Jul 29, 2007
Avery, 300' up Japanese Coulior

Jeffrey Bauer wrote:
any good redneck anchor horror stories to bring to light?


A member of the university climbing club, where I did my undergrad, used to use an old syle seatbelt (steel buckle/latch with the push button in the middle) that connected to itelf to form a loop as part of his anchor setup. That didn't fly so well on club outings.

By Daniel Crescenzo
From Wrongmont, CO
Jul 30, 2007
Crux?

When I first started climbing a friend of wanted to learn how to climb multi-pitch but we only had short cliffs in our immediate area, so he chopped one of his ropes in half (don't ask me). I seconded him and found him with runner clipped into a biner cocked sideways in a crack. Glad I didn't fall considering he was a wirey waif.

By Tom Hanson
From Castle Rock, CO
Jul 30, 2007

Beer Can Bashies.
We used to rig toprope anchors with them at Taylors Falls, MN circa 1978.

By Mark Nelson
From Coniferous, CO
Jul 30, 2007
naughty bull

Three brand new BD turbo express ice screws used for a bail station. Yep, definately not gonna die on that one!! (maybe a v-thread next time??)

By Brian Hansen
From Longmont, CO
Jul 30, 2007

Two good ones:

A leather dress belt near the summit of the Fifth Flatiron, buckle wedged in a crack and obviously used as a rappel or lower point (circa 1972).

While descending the south side of the Third Flatiron, I spied a knotted cotton clothes line hanging on the wall near WC Fields Pinnacle. It was anchored to an enormous hook made of bent re-bar, set over a small chockstone in a gully (circa 1984).

By George Bell
From Boulder, CO
Jul 30, 2007
Zapped by the Simpsonizer!

Brian Hansen wrote:
A leather dress belt near the summit of the Fifth Flatiron, buckle wedged in a crack and obviously used as a rappel or lower point (circa 1972).

There is a story about a belt being used in an emergency to escape from the summit of the The Fist or Hippo Head in one of Gerry Roach's books. Apparently he and David Roberts soloed the thing and then it started raining. If you have been atop this rock it is quite difficult to get off without a rope. Gerry slung a chockstone with his belt and hung off the belt. Any chance this was the same belt you remember? I've always wondered what happened to the belt.

I've rapped off jammed knots a few times. This is actually pretty safe if you have the right crack, but I'd not do it again.

By Brian Hansen
From Longmont, CO
Jul 30, 2007

Not sure, George. This was definitely on the Fifth, near the top of the Catscratch Cracks, found on a miserable snowy day. I've not climbed the Hippo Head. As happens with bail slings that are in good shape, perhaps someone found it there and migrated it to a later epic.

If you are like me, the practice of rapping off knotted slings ceased about the time child number one came along.

By Leo Paik
Administrator
From Westminster, Colorado
Aug 1, 2007

We found a leather belt on a downclimb on Dinosaur Mt once...along with a shoelace on a tree.

By Tim Stich
From Colorado Springs, Colorado
Aug 2, 2007
Looking down from Notchtop

The rappel off of Hippo Head still blows, George. Roy and I used a big rock someone had wrapped some purple webbing around a few times. Always fun trying to determine if the rock is heavy enough.

By Michael Scott
From Denver, Colorado
Aug 2, 2007

On Alpamayo, among other rap anchors, there was the shaft portion of a Charlet-Moser pulsar multimanche driven into the ice with a piece of chord threaded through the bolt hole to thread your rope through...

By Matthew Fienup
Administrator
From Ventura, CA
Aug 2, 2007
Photo by Marisa Fienup.

This is likely the worst anchor I've ever seen.

The yellow "webbing" in the photo is actually a strap from the climber's SUV roof-rack. It's hard to see in this photo, but 2 rubber-ized hooks on the ends of the strap are hooked through the left-hand carabiner.

The anchor is completely non-redundant and relies on the stitching that attaches the rubber-ized hooks to the ends of the strap.

And that quick-draw?!

At least they padded the edge to protect the strap from abrasion.

By jay baichi
Aug 2, 2007
Camp Heartland

at the garden of the gods I scrambled above two climbers top rope anchor. they were top roping through 2 shoulder slings girth hitched around a shrub and a pin. the rope was running straight through the slings-no caribiners! I suggested it wasn't the best system.

By Michal Turczyk
From Las Vegas, NV
Aug 2, 2007
I just can't shake this feeling that someone is watching me...

I ran into a couple from Germany who told me that there is a limestone crag near their house in Bavaria where metal pro is not allowed, so all they can use is knotted rope!!! The guy said the limestone was too soft for bolts and cams would just ruin the rock. I still scratch my head at this.

By George Bell
From Boulder, CO
Aug 2, 2007
Zapped by the Simpsonizer!

Knots in nicely tapered cracks are bomber! I know they are used on certain cliffs in Europe to save soft rock. I've always wondered how hard such knots are to clean, especially if you fall on one.

Aid climbing I have run into the most manky junk that actually held my weight.

By Ladd Raine
Administrator
From Plymouth, NH
Aug 2, 2007
Yours truly.

using knots for pro is totally solid, usually used in rock that is soft/brittle such as soft limestone or super brittle schist/geniss.

I have used my cordalette knotted several times instead of carrying up a huge hex.

If you fall on the knot it is easy enough to get out, sometimes you do have to untie the knot in place to get it out though...bummer.

By Ryan Peterson
From Logan, Utah
Aug 2, 2007

http://www.gipfelbuch.de/schlingen_legen1.htm

Interesting stuff. I talked to a friend in Germany and it's true, no metal pro allowed.

By brenta
From Boulder, CO
Aug 2, 2007
Cima Margherita and Cima Tosa in the Dolomiti di Brenta.  October 1977.

Elbsandstein, near Dresden, is pearhaps the most famous area where knotted slings are the most common type of pro.

By Michal Turczyk
From Las Vegas, NV
Aug 2, 2007
I just can't shake this feeling that someone is watching me...

Wow, that's actually kinda cool. Would love to climb there. Thanks for shedding light on the subject.

By Charles Danforth
From L'ville, CO
Aug 3, 2007
Do a little dance...

Two rusty bongs, each sunk about an inch and a half, tied off in opposition. (Old Rag, Virginia) Yow!

By Lee Smith
Aug 3, 2007
You can love your rope but you can't "LOVE" your rope

In John Long's Book Climbing Anchors on page 60 is a picture of Dale Bard who has just jumared up to a bunch of bashies partially driven into a thin seam and tied off with a series of clove hitches, 2000 feet off the deck on El Cap. The look on his face says it all.

By Tom Hanson
From Castle Rock, CO
Aug 6, 2007

Hi Lee, Didn't that old picture of Dale show him looking at The Birdman's Multi-RURP anchor, not bashies?
Either way, it was a classic shot.

By Benjamin Chang
Aug 20, 2007

Was at the top of Ken's Crack in the gunks; a party was toproping the climb off the trees that are set back about 20 feet; the person who had set up the anchor had run out of webbing and had used his chalkbag belt clipped together with the plastic buckle as a sling. I clipped some of my own gear into the anchor and waited for the guy on the rope to top out. Needless to say, he was not pleased and proceeded to have a discussion/argument with his belayer who had set up the anchor in the first place

By Killis Howard
Aug 20, 2007

Body belay on a flat summit by a tiny, pretty girl. I outweighed her by probably 50 pounds-topped out on Whiskey Peak and realized that if I'd fallen it would have looked like Preston and Wee Man from Jackass 2.

By John W. Knoernschild
From Hartland, WI
Aug 23, 2007
Behold

I was on the West Bluff and DL, WI. We walked up on a terrible TR setup. 1 piece of webbing, tied to a skinny tree (like 4-6 inches around) and then over the edge through a small sharp crack. We laughed and scauled at it. And then looked over to see who was climbing on it. It looked like 2 marine/army type guys with shaved heads and a big ego.


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