so, you're on an 8 hour aid lead (one pitch) and have to go to the bathroom.... what do you do? If you are on a good piece and have a partner and have a pee bottle or poo tube, it shouldn't be too hard, but what if you are soloing a hard aid pitch? Do you put the poo tube and pee bottle on your tag rack ahead of time?

DEPENDS

You take your poo in the morning, especially if you think you're going be tackling an 8 hr. pitch, which will likely be trouser-filling.

Also, if it's an 8 hr. pitch, you're going to be pretty puckered up and not really thinking about nature's call. My longest lead was about 3 hrs., and I certainly wasn't thinking about taking a dump. Making bargains with God, yes. Pooping, no.

All questions are answered in Chongo's Big Wall Bible. A bigger problem is how do you find a belayer willing to sit around for that long?

With the hopes of gettin china doll done last weekend my partner and I were on route shortly after first light. I was ready to clean the first 100 ft by 1:30. I was ignorant to the fact that my partner had minimal aid experience and wanting him to learn more I made him skip most bolts on the upper stretch of the pitch(this made for roughly a 6 hour lead). I lead the next 70' or so but it was rather casual IMO, the partner wanted to come up since I was at 2 nice new bolts 70' higher and for some reason I went along with it instead of linking the next pitch like I planned to. By the time he was at my last piece of pro it was already 4:45. Considering we were only 1/2 way up we bailed once again. I think I'm just gonna rap in to the crux pitch from above next time.(third times a charm right?)

That's rough, he's done it for me before though so what can I say.
You get belayers for this sort of thing by paying your dues and doing it for your partner so he owes you. I find off days with newbies are a pretty painless way of paying the dues. Plus it hones you basics when you have to keep telling someone over and over what to do. I've endured many a 4-6 hour belay/lead aiding (seems standard if it's really tricky of someone is really new to it), never had the bathroom issue arise. Plan ahead.

"There's two kinds of people in the world: those whose arse holes seize up during a crisis and those who shit themselves. Winston Churchill, during the blitz for instance - his sphincter locked with bulldog determination. They say he never shit during the entire Battle of Britain."

check out the movie Rare Birds. It will explain it all.

Fellas:
take the hook outa yer moufs and move on!