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Partner Finder

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

So Marc801 give me a brake, I'm elderly. (Maybe that's the reason no one wants to climb with me)

Em Cos · · Boulder, CO · Joined Apr 2010 · Points: 5
John Robinson wrote:Marc801 give me some suggestions on how to word my "age thing" I'm actually 71 but know that would scare off everyone. No one likes "Elderly" People
Speaking for myself, dishonesty would be a much bigger red flag for me than age. If someone is really willing to climb with a 51 year old, but 71 would be a dealbreaker all else being equal, is that really a person you'd want to climb with anyway? Wouldn't you rather they weed themselves out before wasting your time?

On the other hand, if the first thing I learned about a stranger I was considering roping up with is that they lied, either to trick me into climbing with them or for some other mystery reason, I'd be wondering what else they may have lied about, if they're really trustworthy enough to put my life in their hands, and I'd probably get right back in the car.

I hope I am so lucky as to still be climbing 5.11 when I am 71, that should make you proud, not embarrassed - and you should seek out partners who find that inspiring, not a reason to be "scared off".
John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

Thanks Em Cos. I suppose you are correct. I would, however, tell them my true age before we met. It's just that a lot of young people actually don't like old people. Recently I have been climbing with Jay who is 26 and we get along great so I know that (in many cases) the age difference doesn't matter that much but when they find out I am 71 they typically won't give me a chance. I probably am in better shape and climb harder than most 31 year olds but many would say, "That's fine, but the deal breaker is, you're old" You can say all the complementary things you want (and I appreciate it) but the truth is the truth. My usual climbing partners tend to be over 40 and that's probably more to do with, I have been climbing so long, my original partners are getting older with me. I have been climbing with some of my partners for over 20 years so we started when they were in their 20's and I was in my 50's

Bill M · · Fort Collins, CO · Joined Jun 2010 · Points: 317

I watched a 72 year dude head off into the unknown at Cochise to help a guy that had gotten off route. We were on a 5.8 with a semi hanging belay 100 pct chicken heads. I know these guys have been on the downhill side of things for decades and they STILL climb hard. Oh yeah his partner was in his late 60s. Not to embarrass these guys but Jim Dennis and Jim Loughran are the shit. I was stoked they let me tie in with them that day. I say if you are 71 and are worried about what people think. Show up tie in grab the rack and push off. After the first two pieces go in no one is going to give a shit about how old you are.

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

Bill M: You are missing my point, you said "I say if you are 71 and are worried about what people think"

I am not worried about what people think about me being 71. My only worry is if people know I am 71 they won't give my the time of day as far as this partner stuff goes.

Your second comment: "Show up tie in grab the rack and push off. After the first two pieces go in no one is going to give a shit about how old you are".
You are exactly correct but if they won't "give me the time of day" they will never see "tie in" and see if I can perform.

Bill: Do Jim Dennis and Jim Loughran climb at least 5.12a and are they over 70, if so I have a data base on Supertopo I would like to add them to.

I have probably gone on too long about this old/partner thing.

ClimbLikeAGirl · · Keene Valley · Joined Jun 2015 · Points: 15

John,

It sucks that you feel like people won't give you a chance. Personally I love climbing with any one who has the 'psych', from the old-fogy type (I mean that jokingly and endearingly) to the fresh-outta-the-womb brand new climber. It's fun to gain a perspective of the sport from over the ages, learn new little tricks and tid-bits or maybe really big picture insightful stuff.

Anyone who reads, "71 y/o still climbing 5.11" and follows it by "yeah, I don't want to climb with them", is probably not anyone you'd want to rope up with anyway.

I say Fugg 'em.

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

thanks ClimbLikeAGirl. Sounds like you live in New York. Wish you lived out here in California. Sounds like you'd be a great partner.

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

I added to my "additional information" on my home page the following: Don't let my age scare you, I am 71 going on 41.

How does that sound?

ClimbLikeAGirl · · Keene Valley · Joined Jun 2015 · Points: 15

Thumbs up!

Sounds similar to my boyfriend... 40 going on 14.

Em Cos · · Boulder, CO · Joined Apr 2010 · Points: 5

Sounds like you're really concerned about your age. I think if you believe it's a non-issue, others are more likely to agree with you! I say just let your age and how hard you climb show in your stats, and don't worry about it beyond that. If you make it clear you're worried about your age you give others a reason to worry too.

What makes more sense - if I were to simply state the grade, style, and location I climb at and am looking for partners, or if I add a disclaimer like "hey I know I'm (fill in the blank: young, old, female, short, weak, new) but please don't let that worry you, I still climb well!"

I don't know, just my perspective but to me the second one gives me pause - if you're not confident in yourself, why should I be confident in you?

And yes, I know, you don't lack confidence in your abilities, but making apologies for your age sure makes it sound like you might.

Just be you! Any idiot that can't look past the age to see your climbing abilities and experience is not worth your time anyway.

Optimistic · · New Paltz · Joined Aug 2007 · Points: 450
John Robinson wrote:thanks ClimbLikeAGirl. Sounds like you live in New York. Wish you lived out here in California. Sounds like you'd be a great partner.
On a weekday in the Gunks, someone your age would not be in the slightest bit unusual! Maybe you just need to move? :)

I've always thought of the partner finder as a way to contact people, not to be contacted by them... In other words, mainly you do the searching.

The right gym I'd say could be a much better way to get to know like minded partners.
Marc801 C · · Sandy, Utah · Joined Feb 2014 · Points: 65
Em Cos wrote:Sounds like you're really concerned about your age. I think if you believe it's a non-issue, others are more likely to agree with you! I say just let your age and how hard you climb show in your stats, and don't worry about it beyond that. If you make it clear you're worried about your age you give others a reason to worry too. What makes more sense - if I were to simply state the grade, style, and location I climb at and am looking for partners, or if I add a disclaimer like "hey I know I'm (fill in the blank: young, old, female, short, weak, new) but please don't let that worry you, I still climb well!" I don't know, just my perspective but to me the second one gives me pause - if you're not confident in yourself, why should I be confident in you? And yes, I know, you don't lack confidence in your abilities, but making apologies for your age sure makes it sound like you might. Just be you! Any idiot that can't look past the age to see your climbing abilities and experience is not worth your time anyway.
+100
Just stop mentioning it and making it an issue.
Seb303 · · Westminster, CO · Joined Sep 2015 · Points: 10

John,

I haven't had much trouble with the partner finder, I usually get a response and have found several great partners on it. One of my favorite people to climb with is in his 70's and has been climbing 50 yrs. Can't beat experience.

Two suggestions:

1. Start updating your tick list. Yours doesn't have any ticks. It's good to know a potential partner has been climbing recently at the grades their profile reports they can climb.

2. Add a profile picture.

When a potential partner doesn't have the two aforementioned things on their profile, it tends to deter me.

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

Sebastian Christopher: thanks for the good information. I tried to drag a picture from "my pictures" to my profile page but couldn't get it to do it. How do I do it? I will update my tick list.

Seb303 · · Westminster, CO · Joined Sep 2015 · Points: 10

Go to your page and just below your information area there is a photo album area. Click on it or drag mouse cursor over it and should give you option to add photos to the photo album. Once you've updated a photo to that album, drag the mouse cursor over it and it will give you the option to "make your personal photo".

John Robinson · · Elk Grove, ca · Joined Apr 2006 · Points: 747

Sebastian Christopher: I went to the photo album section you suggested and clicked on it and couldn't see anywhere that would allow me to add a picture. It only let me add text.

Tim Stich · · Colorado Springs, Colorado · Joined Jan 2001 · Points: 1,520

It's not just because you are a dude. The main reason could be no one in your area really climbs. Here in the Front Range, you can't swing a stick without hitting a climber, so plenty are looking for partners at all times. Most of us who have stayed put for a while have tons of partners and really aren't soliciting more.

So the best plan is to sell yourself. You heard me, sell it baby. Post cool pictures of you smiling and climbing. Project what a cool ass bro you are and how frankly, shit, they missin' out. Show just how witty you are in your post looking for climbing peeps. Share some info on a good quality burrito shop.

I know it sounds dumb, but it's a good way to go. None of us know each other, so any information is good. Pics, conversations on threads, lists of routes we have done, etc. Anything to get a read on the person. Are you going to like hanging with them? Will you be able to recognize them at the coffee shop?

And sell that shit, baby.

Yeahhh.

Marc801 C · · Sandy, Utah · Joined Feb 2014 · Points: 65
John Robinson wrote:Sebastian Christopher: thanks for the good information. I tried to drag a picture from "my pictures" to my profile page but couldn't get it to do it. How do I do it?
Drag and drop isn't supported for uploading photos.
See this thread on how to add a profile picture: mountainproject.com/v/addin…
Russ Keane · · Salt Lake · Joined Feb 2013 · Points: 392

Another problem is, people are using other forum areas for finding partners. Take a look at the "eastern" section... Half the posts are "Who wants to climb at Rumney tomorrow".

Website mgmt may want to start policing the forums, and move threads that are partner-based only to their appropriate section. The overlap is killing the flow.

dylan grabowski · · Denver · Joined Mar 2015 · Points: 95

Shit man, I'm on my second season in the Valley and I love climbing with folks who have some experience under their belt, regardless of age. I'm positive I could learn a thing or two from you, and would love to rope up in the Valley, in Tahoe, or anywhere else in the Sierra!

Come to think of it, my youngest partner is in his late 30's, and he's a total hardman. What are you interested in climbing this summer??

Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

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