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Not so great satisfaction of the climbing friend's flash

Original Post
Aleks Zebastian · · Boulder, CO · Joined Jul 2014 · Points: 175

Climbing friend,

What may you do when your climbing friend, they make very difficult flash of climbing rocks you both try, but then you fail the flash, falling off slippery little holds like helpless child, forearms not refreshed at crux?

You must pretend to be happy for your climbing friend, like Chris Sharma for Adam Ondra when climbing friend Ondra send La Dura Dura, myah?

Is this not a difficult, unenjoyable experience that crush the soul? How would you be dealing with this? Are you finding a way to be happy for your climbing friend and perhaps not miserable and angry?

Or do you simply pretend to be happy, but then -
- Short rope them at crux of next bold flash, causing them to do the falling?
- Sandbag them horrible into flash attempt on route you have ruthlessly wired through countless ascent so you may watch them fail and fall?
- Refuse to ever climb with them again?
- Wait until they are looking not, and then coat their sticky rubber shoe with olive oil?
- Sabotage their chalk bag?
- Replace their bucket of salmon fish heads with one of stinky trout or catfish heads?
- Replace their high-quality cheesesteak with a low quality arby's sandwich with fake synthetic cheese sauce product?

Myah?

DavisMeschke Guillotine · · Pinedale, WY · Joined Oct 2013 · Points: 225

Wut?

FrankPS · · Atascadero, CA · Joined Nov 2009 · Points: 276
DavisMeschke wrote:Wut?
It's very important to understand Aleks' native tongue. Whatever it is. Not an easy task for many, but his insight is phenomenal (I think). And if his insight isn't phenomenal, his posts are good-natured. You will be a fan, soon. Or not.

Aleks,

Most people climb harder than I do, so I am not crushed by my mediocrity. I have accepted my limitations. Moreover, I am just impressed by what some people can climb and am happy to just, occasionally, be a belay slave.
christoph benells · · tahoma · Joined Nov 2014 · Points: 306

i do the cheesesteak one

Eliot Augusto · · Lafayette, CO · Joined Dec 2013 · Points: 60

Sabotage their chalk bag with sap from a tree. At first they will be happy about this new found stickiness and feel much courage. But then when they get to the crux your climbing friend will discover that tree sap is not something to be happy about.

Gabe Schwartz · · Hope Valley · Joined Mar 2011 · Points: 5

Climbing friend Aleks,
try adding Ex-Lax to the hippy trail mix to teach them that fish heads are the only way. Make sure their next climb is of the traverse so that you are not under them.

~ Gabe

djh860 · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Dec 2014 · Points: 110

I am totally happy for my friends success. Get over yourself you are not that important

FrankPS · · Atascadero, CA · Joined Nov 2009 · Points: 276
djh860 wrote:I am totally happy for my friends success. Get over yourself you are not that important
Gettin' kinda serious here, aren't we? I think the OP's initial post was completely in jest.
highaltitudeflatulentexpulsion · · Colorado · Joined Oct 2012 · Points: 35

Aleks, how does a moderately attractive woman make herself appear hot?

There is your answer climbing friend. You must get uglier friends.

Edit, I meant weaker friends.

Jim Titt · · Germany · Joined Nov 2009 · Points: 490
Aleks Zebastian wrote:Climbing friend, What may you do when your climbing friend, they make very difficult flash of climbing rocks you both try, but then you fail the flash, falling off slippery little holds like helpless child, forearms not refreshed at crux?
There are no "friends" who are stronger and more talented than myself. They are "other" climbers to be despised for living such limited lifestyles that they can only think to train and diet for climbing.
Joe Garibay · · Ventura, Ca · Joined Apr 2014 · Points: 86

Hahaha^^^ nice one.
Aleks, do you climb near creeks? Crawfish in partners chalk bag will warm your heart and belly, giving you a better chance to flash while partner sucks his thumb.

RMueller · · Buena Vista, CO · Joined Feb 2014 · Points: 0

Aleks,
I'm afraid that tying the ego to the flash is destined to fail. As you age and your well developed pecs decline to a flabby case of gynecomastia the days of a proud flash will be over. You should be prepared. As for now I recommend a fish head switcharoo.

Aleks Zebastian · · Boulder, CO · Joined Jul 2014 · Points: 175

Climbing friend,

these are ideas most great.

I am thinking that the peoples they like to say that the gradings they are not important and the ego must be banish, but I do believe they are doing the fooling of themselves, and deep in their heart they yearn for bold, ego-boosting flash and the crushing of all other climbers and to make impress everyone around their local crag, state, and the universe.

climbing friend mueller! You do not bring joy to the heart with your suggestion of sloppy man breast! Shame on you and may you awake with slimy, thawing fish heads covering your face!

Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

General Climbing
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