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Max Forbes
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Mar 12, 2015
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Colorado
· Joined Jan 2014
· Points: 108
I've done it. Relationship lasted two years. Wasn't exactly what I was looking for, but the gym on the first date worked pretty well
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Pnelson
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Mar 12, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jan 2015
· Points: 635
As long as you're not trying to "impress" her by getting repeated belays on your project, or spending all your time on that rad red tape boulder problem, you should be fine.
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Tim Stich
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Mar 12, 2015
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Colorado Springs, Colorado
· Joined Jan 2001
· Points: 1,520
I don't know, it's better meeting for a neutral activity like hiking or just for drinks. If you take someone to do that thing that you are competent in, they will have pressure to do it at least as well as you do. It's putting them on the spot in a way and they might feel like apologizing if they just don't get it. If you are meeting for the first time, too, a drink is easier to leave from. In the end, it doesn't so much matter what you do. If they aren't right for you, they will let you know.
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Will S
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Mar 12, 2015
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Joshua Tree
· Joined Nov 2006
· Points: 1,061
I see it a lot, but never done it, as I spend enough time in the f'in gym already between coaching and my own training, and I sure don't want to be in there when on a date. Just beware, 'cause there are a-holes like me that absolutely love to burn you off in front of your lady friend when it's obvious that you are on a first date. So ask yourself: Are you secure enough in your coolness that a ripped guy, who's floating your projects, and is financially secure, catches her eye that you are going to get a second date? Because you know, she may just go "wow, climbing is fun, and there are TONs of hot, fit guys in here so maybe I'll come back by myself or with my girlfriends". Seen that happen more than once too! Also seen ladies (and a couple guys too when the girl was the existing climber bringing the guy for his first time) who couldn't deal with the stress. Fear of heights, fear of doing something wrong and dropping someone...turns into nightmare with tears or yelling. Dinner and movie or the midday coffee shop thing is cliche, but it's popular for a reason. Good luck.
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Bill Kirby
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Mar 12, 2015
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Keene New York
· Joined Jul 2012
· Points: 480
^^^^^^ Haha.. Being up to date on the rent and owning a car instead of taking the bus does not make you financially stable.
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Kurt G
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Mar 12, 2015
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Monticello, UT
· Joined Nov 2012
· Points: 156
I'd say go for it. I work at a gym and meet people all the time who are on their first date. it sounds like this will be a first for her. she will probably be really self conscious and nervous (as with all first time climbers, not just women) just be supportive and encouraging but still maintain a good conversation and im sure she will have a great time. also make sure you have something to do after and not just climbing or as a back up in the off chance it doesn't go well. Good luck
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Paul Hutton
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Mar 12, 2015
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Nephi, UT
· Joined Mar 2012
· Points: 740
Girls that climb love getting a good belayer that knows what he/she is doing (who doesn't love a belayer that can get the closest to reading their mind while they're climbing?!). Girls that don't climb love the exercise that they never feel, and they love to look successful in front of a guy that they're interested in. This is simple! I've always had a good time climbing with ladies!
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Elizabeth929
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Mar 12, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jul 2014
· Points: 0
I went on a climbing first date and loved it! In fact, I wasn't really that into the guy but was interested in trying a new workout and something that transferred to an outdoor activity so I went on the date even though I wasn't too keen on him. He completely grew on me and I attribute a hefty portion of that to a few climbing dates. We started with bouldering so neither of us had the stress of me being an inexperienced belayer. Long story short, we dated for a while, we don't date anymore, but I still climb and am thrilled to have learned!
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Sarah K
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Mar 12, 2015
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Boulder, CO
· Joined May 2009
· Points: 80
I say go for it - but make sure to listen to her and pay attention to how she's feeling. Too many times I've seen experienced climbers take dates out climbing for the first time and they push the date way out of their comfort zone and they are having a miserable time. A little bit outside the comfort zone is exhilarating, a lot is terrifying. Just have fun and dial it back if you have to.
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tim
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Mar 12, 2015
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Boulder, CO
· Joined Aug 2006
· Points: 507
I can't think of a douchier environment than a climbing gym, you sure you don't wanna go outside? Even if she ends up not being into climbing at least you can spend time in a decent atmosphere.
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LindsayH
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Mar 12, 2015
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Kingston, NY
· Joined Jun 2014
· Points: 55
wa5.10 wrote:Is if its too much trust to put into a person your just meeting? How well do you know her? You've obviously talked before since you've hinted at rock climbing. Trust can vary widely from person to person, but I don't think it's too much risk for a first date scenario. Especially if she's an outdoorsy/adventurous type. My first time climbing was at the Gunks with my kickboxing instructor at the time. We had known each other for a month or two prior, but hadn't started dating yet. Apparently I passed the harness test. We've been dating for three and a half years now and he successfully turned me into a climber girlfriend. wa5.10 wrote:Is this going to blow up in my face if she doesn't like it? That depends on how you handle it. Make it about her. Take her on easy routes until she says she wants to try something harder. If she learns to belay, don't go on some super hard route that you might struggle on. Make her first time belaying easy and climb stuff you know you're not going to fall on. If it seems like she's stressing out or not enjoying it, suggest that you take a break or go somewhere else to grab a bite to eat or something. Don't make her feel like she has to spend the whole day there just because you paid for the day pass. Who knows if she's actually going to like it, but even if she never climbs again, it could still be a really fun first date.
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Tim Stich
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Mar 12, 2015
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Colorado Springs, Colorado
· Joined Jan 2001
· Points: 1,520
So what do you ladies think about robbing a liquor store for a first date? Too soon?
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Eric Chabot
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Mar 12, 2015
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Salt Lake City, UT
· Joined Jul 2011
· Points: 45
Climbing is a great first date. This is because of a concept in human psychology called misattribution. As your date gets on the wall and freaks out, her body will experience symptoms of (physiological, not sexual) arousal: elevated breathing, hr and bp, skin flushed and sweating, etc. She or he will unconsciously confuse this normal reaction to stress with a reaction to his or her attraction for you. See Elizabeth's post above. Roller coasters and scary movies will do this also. Works like a charm, as long as you are not a douche. Listen to the enormocast ladies' night and listener mail episodes for more on not being a chauvinist male climber douche.
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MelRock
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Mar 12, 2015
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New Jersey
· Joined Jan 2014
· Points: 30
I think that going on a date where you DO something rather than watch a movie/show or have nicey-nice conversation over dinner will allow you to get to know each other on a deeper level. Things like ego, temper, behavior in a public space/toward strangers, how you handle frustration can be revealed, and in the long run, you might waste less time on a bad fit. That said, I feel strongly that you should plan the date as two parts. Go somewhere neutral after an hour or two max. And while at the gym, be sensitive to the possibility that she feels awkward up on the wall with you staring at her butt as she struggles on something she knows is beginner or "party wall." And keep in mind how you'd feel if you were at her favorite sci-fi book convention, hot yoga studio, or quilting festival. (I've a close friend who quilts. I swear, people still do it.) You might think it's neat that she does that activity and you respect her expertise in that field, but it's just not for you. It probably goes without saying that if date-one goes well, you should offer to share in one of HER passions/hobbies on a future date.
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Paul Hutton
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Mar 12, 2015
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Nephi, UT
· Joined Mar 2012
· Points: 740
tim wrote:I can't think of a douchier environment than a climbing gym, you sure you don't wanna go outside? Even if she ends up not being into climbing at least you can spend time in a decent atmosphere. There ain't nobody that doesn't like to climb, then have a meal at a campfire!
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Savanna
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Mar 13, 2015
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Monterey, CA
· Joined Dec 2012
· Points: 55
I took a girl to the climbing gym for our first date. It's 2 years later we moved to California and now spend our weekends in Yosemite. 10/10 would date again.
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Happiegrrrl
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Mar 13, 2015
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Gunks
· Joined Dec 2005
· Points: 60
My first time climbing was in the gym, as a first meeting. Obviously it took. I remember feeling absolutely exhilarated when I had stepped both feet onto hold, both hands and then.....how to move. Wow! Just don't do what my date did and get upset if you try to get touchy-feely and she isn't wanting it. For me, it was clearly not a physical attraction to the dude, but the climbing was fun and I WAS enjoying myself. But he kept upping the aggrssiveness, trying to touch me when I'd get lowered and other times. Finally, he got frustrated and let me drop the last six feet on a lower. That was, of course, the last climb of the night. Even a total n00b, I knew that was just not cool. Anyway - If she likes it, it can be fun but try not to stare at her ass. And if it seems like she's not all that into it, which could happen for any number of reasons besides she doesn't actually like the idea of climbing, ask her if she'd prefer to wrap things up and go for a coffee or something. Let her off the hook instead of trying to get your full session in. Other things to consider: - She may be self-conscious about not knowing what to do. Don't assume she would know basic stuff, and be patient. - She may not be a very good belayer. Don't forget to show her properly how to belay and take it easy on routes until you are confident in her abilities. Don't put her in the position of watching you sketched out and about to fall off something before she knows just what catching a fall entails. - I've seen so many guys put a woman who has never climbed before on something that is hard, when they have no idea what the woman can do. It's not fun to have someone suggest something and then flail at it. It could be humiliating, or set up a feeling of mistrust. It can be scary, even in a gym, and when a person is scared, they may become emotional in ways they would prefer not be on display with someone they barely know. - She may climb really well. Don't get jealous, but don't be so overly enthusiastic that it doesn't seem genuine either.
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Jon Powell
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Mar 13, 2015
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LAWRENCEVILLE GEORGIA
· Joined Jan 2012
· Points: 110
I guess you will have to ask my current girlfriend of 6 months if the climbing gym was a good first date. All jokes aside we had a first date scheduled for the coming weekend for a normal first date but I figured why not and asked her to meet me at the gym. She was not a climber so it gave me a chance to show off pulling on plastic. We had dinner after and the rest as they say is history. 6 months later we are as happy as 2 people can be and she now considers herself a climber. Lead her first outdoor sport route this past weekend, joined the Access Fund and did her first multi pitch climb. So to answer your question it is a great idea.
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eli poss
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Mar 13, 2015
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Durango, CO
· Joined May 2014
· Points: 525
Happiegrrrl wrote: Anyway - If she likes it, it can be fun but try not to stare at her ass. But that's the best part of belaying a female climber, especially if she has to hang a lot. Btw, take her advice and don't ever take my advice when it comes to dating. actually just don't take dating advice from men on Mtn Project.
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mediocre
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Mar 13, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jul 2013
· Points: 0
So I clicked on your profile because I was hoping to see that you were 13 and still just scared of girls. Then I realized that you just need to sober up. Put the bong down, be reasonable, and go to the gym. Don't be so paranoid. If she likes it, she likes it, if she doesn't figure something out for the second date. If you don't get a second date, it wasn't because you took her to a climbing gym.
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