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Pooping in mother nature

Original Post
Mountain Project · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Jun 2014 · Points: 0

As a climber of almost 25 years I am getting sick and tired of people shoving their "poop ethics/standards" in my face. I will poop how I please, regardless of what crag I am at. I don't care what any climber says or thinks of my pooping ethics/standards! So stop telling me how to poop! And no, I will not poop in a bag (and carry it out), or burn my poop paper!

Ok, my pooping style is very simple, elegant, and "organic" when outdoors. Here it is:

POOP LIKE A CAT, yes, dig a hole ( minimum of one foot deep far away from the crag/camping areas/water sources) and bury it. You can also dig like a cat if you prefer, that might be funny. However, if possible I like to plunk down rocks in the hole (on top of the poop)to create a "composite" of sorts. Then I fill it in with dirt. As an added precaution I will cap the filled in hole with a big stone. This technique keeps pesky dogs from digging it up and enjoying a late afternoon snack.

I have done this at world class crags over the past two decades with a lot of success. I refuse to use toilettes at climbing areas, climbers (not all) can be nasty and vile creatures. Pooping under the wide open sky in the mountains can be a very liberating, soul-invigorating, and spiritual experience.

Oh ya, why do some of you climbers insist on needing toilette paper when pooping out in mother nature? REALLY? Are you a child? Do you need a diaper and baby wipes? Did your parents not instruct you on how to properly clean your bum in the great outdoors without toilette paper? Gee whiz..... what a self entitled generation coming up.

Furthermore, you don't need a shovel to dig a hole. Anyone ever hear of a stick? How about your foot? Or your hands?

FrankPS · · Atascadero, CA · Joined Nov 2009 · Points: 276

Eleanor - Is that you?

splitclimber · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Jan 2007 · Points: 18

sure is
...and she's got a dirty bum

J Q · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Mar 2012 · Points: 50

I nominate this for the funniest rant of the month award.

You guys are total morons thinking this is the Smelly Hippy who couldn't string two sentences together to save her life. This troll is way beyond the realm of what old E is capable of.

Here is why this can't be old Trollenor

1. She doesn't visit world class crags
2. She doesn't know how to use words like "organic", "elegant", or "composite"
3. There is no text speak present
4. There are no misspellings.

Although there is one part that bears repeating:

Death to climbers who use toilet paper at the crags!

G Halsne · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Oct 2011 · Points: 1,487

Haha! Best of the most recent poop threads. I fully endorse the method!! Meow! Spiritual indeed:)

But...I must admit... Once I started pooping outdoors... It was hard to go back!! I also started using diaper wipes for my dirty bung...and it just leaves you so fresh and clean. I now patently use diaper wipes indoors and outdoors (packed out the wipes of course)

Dump and send guys! Dump...and Send.

Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

General Climbing
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